The Story of Someone Named Blaze
by F. E. M. Darkblitz
Summary: What would've happened if someone else was a main character in the anime? This is my guess. Chapter 8 is up. T for violence and horrific elements. Now being coauthored with Ender Zero Missingno and rubyminuszero.
1. Blaze Drops By

**Hey! How ya doin'? This is my first fanfic, so please understand if it's not what you're used to seeing. I've seen other stories with main characters of the title of Blaze, and to the authors of such fanfiction, I solemnly promise (I don't really swear) that I did NOT steal your idea; I was working on this LONG before I saw your stories. Now, I just need someone to do the disclaimer... Aw, Mew, I don't have anyone to help out yet... Oh well, I'll do it myself.**

**Disclaimer: F. E. M. Darkblitz does NOT own Pokemon, because if he did, he would probably be doing something else right now. He does, however, own his own character, the name of which is Blaze. (Why am I typing in third person?) And if Blaze knew that he was under F. E. M. Darkblitz's ownership, he'd probably be pretty dang ticked off. Good thing he doesn't know yet...**

**NOTE: This story is basically what the cartoon would be if it was a series of books, and I owned it, and Blaze was a main character in it.**

He was walking down the road. He didn't know where he was; all he had was his few possessions in his black backpack. Nobody knew who he was; he didn't even know if he knew who he was. Well, his name was Firedusk Darkblitz, he knew that much, and he had two middle names, (but if those were revealed, I'd get sued. All I can tell you are his middle initials: E and M) but he liked to call himself Blaze. But everything was a mystery to him at this point. He didn't really know where he was from, or where he was going. He only remembered being thrown high up in the air, possibly hundreds of feet, falling from the sky and landing in the ocean, very close to land. When he made it to shore, he saw a sign that said: **Pallet Town: 5 Miles****. **So, he walked in the direction the sign pointed.

Blaze was about twelve years old (he would turn thirteen in a few months). He knew that because he had a small black pocket calendar with important dates marked on it in his backpack. Blaze had dark brown hair with streaks of red in it. He wore glasses that had thin black rims, and he wore a black-and-dark red jacket and black shorts. He had no idea how his glasses stayed on when he fell so far and plunged into the ocean, but that wasn't really important. He also had some money, a notebook, a pencil, some rope, and a few Pokémon books with him. He also had some empty Poké Balls, a water bottle, and a few stray pieces of clothing. But he was hungry. And he had no food left. Just as he felt that he couldn't go any further, he saw a few houses just down the road. _Pallet Town_, he thought. He finally passed out in front of a house, which just so happened to be the Ketchum residence.

Delia Ketchum was sweeping the kitchen when she heard a faint _thump_ outside.

"What was that?" she asked herself.

She opened the door to find a boy, almost a teenager by the looks of it, lying in the road, right in front of her house. He was wearing black and dark red clothes, with a black backpack. But that didn't really matter to Delia at the moment.

_I've got to get him inside and put him on the couch, _she thought.

She picked him up. _He's extremely light, and he's only barely five feet tall. Why is he all wet? He smells like the ocean._

Within five minutes, he was on the couch with a wet washcloth on his head, and he had a cold bottle of water next to him.

_He's got a pretty bad fever,_ thought Delia, _and it looks like he hasn't eaten in days. _Suddenly, the boy began to stir. _Is he waking up?_

The boy began tossing and turning. _Oh no, _thought Delia.

He began to murmur, and then he started to get louder. " Stop, don't do that. What'd she do to you? You idiots. You don't know what's good for you, do you? If you even touch her, I'll… You wouldn't… I'LL GET YOU FOR THAT! STOP IT! EEEUURRAAAAAGH!" He sat up, gasping for breath; the washcloth fell to his lap.

"Mom, what is going on down here? Is something the matter-Who is THAT?"

Ash Ketchum, Delia's son, who would turn ten in about a week, had just come down the stairs.

"Ash, honey, come here."

By now the boy was flailing. "YOU'LL PAY FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE! YOU'VE HURT HER! GO AWAY! NEVER COME BACK, YOU IDIOTS!" His eyes were open, burning dark red. He was throwing punches at the air.

Ash came into the living room and smacked the boy across the face.

Delia glared at her son. "Ash Ketchum, how dare- Hey, I think that did it…"

The boy's eyes turned their normal color: pitch black. He looked around, a bewildered look on his face. "What the hey- Where am I?"

"You're at the Ketchum residence. I'm Delia Ketchum, and this is my son, Ash," replied Delia.

"Um, it's… very nice to meet you. My name's Firedusk Darkblitz, but you can call me Blaze. Apparently, that's my name because my eyes are black, but they burn like dark red when I'm… overcome with emotion," said the boy.

"I see…"

"Was I sleep-talking?" asked Blaze.

"No, more like sleep-raging. Your eyes were on fire," replied Ash.

Blaze's eyes lowered. "I'm so sorry. I have a tendency to do that." He smiled. "People say that I can tell the future in dreams when I sleep-talk. That's why my eyes burn when I'm yelling in my sleep. My memory is better than that of most people, so I remember almost every dream like that in my entire life… until I lost most of my memory. My dreams have been so freaky lately, that was the worst yet… By the way, you have a beautiful home. I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble…"

"Think nothing of it," said Delia immediately. "Would you like something to eat? I was just about to make lunch.

Blaze's stomach made a roaring noise. "Well, I hate to impose…"

"How long has it been since you've last eaten?" Delia asked.

Blaze thought. "Almost three days," he replied.

Ash's jaw dropped.

"Then I'm making lunch for three people today," said Delia.

Twenty minutes later, Blaze set down his fork. "That was a great meal, Mrs. Ketchum. I can't remember the last time I had something so good." He scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Actually, I can't remember much of anything, now that I think about it."

"Thank you, Blaze. But perhaps we should talk about what you do remember. How did you get here? Why were you all alone? Why were you so- deprived of nourishment?"

"Well, starting from where I remember, I was thrown maybe hundreds of feet in the sky, and I landed in the ocean, really close to land. When I made it to shore, I saw a sign that said PALLET TOWN: 5 miles. I walked until I saw Pallet Town, and when I couldn't go any further, I blacked out. So that's why I was all wet. I also have a shadowy memory of the last time I had a meal, which was about three days ago. So, that's how I got here."

"A very fascinating story, Blaze. Now why don't you go clean yourself up?" said Delia.

Once Blaze was cleaned up, and all the dishes were washed, Blaze, Ash and Delia decided to talk some more.

"Blaze, do you have any Pokémon?" asked Ash.

"Well, I have about six empty PokéBalls, but I don't have any Pokémon," answered Blaze. "Well, at least, not that I remember..."

"I have an idea!" said Ash. "I'm going to Professor Oak's lab on the other side of town in a week to get my first Pokémon and a Pokédex. Maybe you should come with me, Blaze!"

Blaze thought about it for a little bit. "I'll go if your mom lets me, Ash."

"How could I say no to a brilliant idea like that, Ash? Of course Blaze can go. He's not my son, I can't tell him not to," said Delia.

"Great!" exclaimed Ash.

Over the next six days, while Blaze was recovering, he and Ash became great friends. They talked together about what it would be like. On the eve of Ash's tenth birthday, at 9:00 P.M, they had one last conversation.

"You know, Ash, I don't know if Professor Oak will give me a Pokémon _or _a Pokédex. After all, I'm not from Pallet Town. I'm not even from Kanto. I'm from... another region that you probably don't know about," said Blaze sadly. He sighed. _I probably shouldn't tell him where I'm from just yet... At least I had the region's name in my calendar..._

"Nah, I'm sure he'll give you everything you need," Ash said.

"You think so?"

"Professor Oak's a nice guy, he won't turn you down. Besides, Mom already called him up, and he said you would be welcome to have a Pokémon and Pokédex."

"Thanks, Ash," said Blaze. "Should I sleep down here tonight? No offense, but I don't think you'll be sleeping very much, what with becoming a Pokémon Trainer and all. "

"If you don't mind, Blaze, that'd be great, thanks. Here." Ash tossed a big sleeping bag to Blaze. It had its own black sack, and the sleeping bag was red on the front, and black on the back. "Mom says you can take it with you when you leave…" Ash's head drooped.

"What're you talking, about, Ash? I was going to come with you, if you didn't mind, since I have nowhere else to go, and I could use a great adventure. Not like I haven't had one before…" said Blaze, recalling being thrown into the ocean. "The entire idea of getting a Pokémon and a Pokédex is to go on a journey."

"Wow, you'd come with me, Blaze?"

"What else could I do?"

"Well, you could- OWWWWWWWWW!"

Blaze had hit Ash over the head with a frying pan. "Don't be dumb," said Blaze simply, "and I won't do that. Your mom said I could take it with me, since she didn't need it. So, you'd better watch it," added Blaze tauntingly.

Ash rubbed his scalp. "I'm going upstairs." He did so.

"If you're late, I'm going to Professor Oak's without you!" Blaze called after him.

Blaze sat in his new sleeping bag and thought. "That dream I had a week ago… It was about a girl. She had mostly red clothes, and brown hair. She was a great friend. Then some bad guys showed up, and two of their Pokémon used Poison Sting on us. I wasn't hit as much as she was, so I knew I would live, but she was hurt very badly… And then… Ash Ketchum slapped me across the face and woke me up. Come to think of it, I think that girl was friends with Ash, too… Could I be telling the future again? Well, I'll find out someday…" His eyes glowed dark red again. "I hope I never see those bad guys." And with that, he fell asleep.

**HAAAAAAAA! Wow, that was a bit random... but the first chapter is up and rarin' to go. You know the drill; click the GO button in the bottom left corner and REVIEW. I require at least one review for each chapter to be posted, so if you like the story (or not; there are some who don't appreciate TRUE genius), review so you can read on! Plus, I dedicate each chapter to whoever was the most helpful or the best reviewer, so you could also become FAMOUS!! (sorta) Until next time, this is F. E. M. Darkblitz, signing off.**


	2. The Painful Start to an Eventful Future

**Hey, everybody! And, this chappie is dedicated to... pikachuhunter1! Thanks for reviewing. You're the first and only to review so far. And to answer your question about Growlithe, yes, he will get one. I'm not sure if he'll keep it in his main party or send it to Prof. Oak, but he WILL get one. Who's up for the disclaimer?**

**Blaze: If you want, I'll do it.**

**Sure! Shoot!**

**Blaze: F. E. M. Darkblitz does not own Pokemon, but he does own me. That's very disturbing, Darkblitz... You own me, and you have the same initials AND last name as I do...**

**Yeah, It's weird. Read!**

Gengar and Nidorino were battling it out. Nidorino dodged a swipe from Gengar, and jumped over Gengar. Gengar rolled out of the way. Nidorino dashed toward Gengar, but Gengar rolled yet again. The crowd in the stadium roared with excitement. Nidorino sprinted at Gengar, about to use a Horn Attack.

"And Nidorino begins the battle with a Horn Attack," said the announcer.

Gengar jumped on top of Nidorino and bounced away, stunning Nidorino.

"Oh, but Gengar bounces right back!"

Gengar emitted waves of power.

"And there it is, the Hypnosis power of Gengar!"

Within seconds, Nidorino was asleep.

"This could be the end of Nidorino!"

A red beam of light recalled Nidorino to its PokéBall.

"Wait! The trainer recalls Nidorino!"

Nidorino's Trainer put Nidorino's PokéBall away and tossed out another one. Gengar moved out of the way of the PokéBall. A humongous snake made of gigantic boulders emerged from the PokéBall.

"Oh, it's Onix! Now this giant Pokémon's on the attack!"

Onix dove toward Gengar. Gengar jumped backwards.

"Oh, but Gengar jumps aside! Gengar is moving beautifully today; its training is tough-

"Yes," said a boy over his TV, pulling on his lime green fingerless gloves. "I am Ash." Looking around his room you could tell that he loved Pokémon. He had a Poliwag pencil sharpener, and a Clefairy coin bank, among other things. "And now that I'm ten," he said, tugging on his shoe laces, "I can finally get my Pokémon license." He put on his red-and-white hat with an oddly shaped olive green L on the front. "I will journey to gain the wisdom of Pokémon training," he said, taking a toy Voltorb off of the shelf above his bed. "And I hereby declare to the Pokémon of the world: I will be a Pokémon master. Pokémon master! That is what I'll-"

"Ash, get to bed!"

Ash fell forward; the toy Voltorb flew out of his hand and was caught by his mother, Delia. The Voltorb opened to reveal a clock, complete with cuckoo Pidgey on a spring. "Pidgey, Pidgey!" it cried.

"It's eleven o'clock, and you should be asleep. Blaze is being smart about starting his journey; he's getting lots of rest! He went to sleep almost two hours ago!"

Ash was on top of his plush Snorlax. "But tomorrow I begin my Pokémon journey. I can't sleep. Besides, both Blaze and I are traveling together."

"Well, if you can't sleep, you should at least get ready for tomorrow. Here, watch this," she said, pointing a remote at Ash's TV and pressing a button.

Suddenly, Prof. Oak appeared on the TV screen. "Good evening, Pallet. Tomorrow's the big day for the newest class of Pokémon students. I'd like to introduce you to Bulbasaur, Charmander, and Squirtle," pointing to a picture of each. "Each one is available for new Trainees. Which one shall you choose?"

"Go to bed when this is done," said Delia.

"All right, I'm going," said Ash, staring at the TV.

"And change into your pajamas, okay?" Delia told him as she left.

"I'm going." _To be a Pokémon master._

"Thanks very much for all that you've done, Mrs. Ketchum. I don't know where I'd be without you and Ash," said Blaze, having just swallowed a mouthful of pancakes. The sun was barely over the mountains, but Blaze wanted to get his Pokémon before Ash did, and start their Pokémon journey early in the day.

"Oh, it was my pleasure, Blaze. After I heard your story, I wouldn't think of letting you leave without any food, or water, or a sleeping bag, for that matter. By the way, I fixed up your things and made you some new clothes," said Delia.

"You did?"

"Oh, of course. What'll you be wearing when you do your laundry?"

"Well, when you put it that way, I would need a new set of clothes for my journey," said Blaze.

"Well, I fixed up your backpack, made you a new black shirt and a dark red shirt, got you a black hat, some black underwear (boxers, of course) and made sure you had some more black shorts, with some sweatpants if it gets cold. I also made some straps, so you could strap your sleeping bag to your backpack."

"I can't thank you enough for all this, Mrs. Ketchum. Thanks a lot. And don't worry; I'll keep a good eye on Ash for you. Speaking of Ash, you would think he would be down here eating himself crazy by now, wouldn't you think?"

"I don't know, Blaze. Unlike you, Ash was up past eleven last night."

"Of course. You put everything in my backpack?

"Yes."

"What about the frying pan?"

"How could I forget about that, Blaze?"

"Great. You'll be seeing us off, won't you?"

"Oh no, I was just going to stay here and watch TV," said Delia sarcastically.

"Well, I'm going to run ahead to Professor Oak's. I want to be the first one to get their Pokémon and Pokédex!" He got up, picked up his things, and headed for the front door. "Tell Ash to hurry up!"

"Goodbye, Blaze!" called Delia. Blaze shut the door.

Blaze walked down the road to Prof. Oak's lab, whistling along the way. "I hope Ash isn't still sleeping or something. Oh, well. He'll show up later."

Before long, Blaze was in front of the stairs to Prof. Oak's lab. When he got to the building, Prof. Oak was waiting outside.

"Well, you're here bright and early, Blaze!" said Prof. Oak.

"Wha- How do you know my name, Professor Oak?"

"Delia told me you were coming. So, ready to choose your Pokémon?"

"You mean… you'll let me choose a Pokémon? And give me a Pokédex? And PokéBalls? Wait, I already have some PokéBalls…"

"Of course! That's why you came, right?"

Blaze and Prof. Oak went into the lab.

Ash was sleeping in his bed. "Raising… Bulbasaur… That'd be really simple…" he muttered in his sleep. "It's perfect… for beginners…"

Ash threw a PokéBall in his dream. "I choose you! Bulbasaur!" A Bulbasaur came out of the PokéBall and gaped at Ash.

"And then… there's… Squirtle…" Ash murmured, his Voltorb alarm clock rolling off the shelf and into his hand.

He threw another PokéBall. "I choose you! Squirtle!" A smiling Squirtle popped out.

"Choose it or lose it…" said Ash, sitting up, the Voltorb clock gone from his palm.

Before long, sunlight was streaming through the window. A Dodrio, standing on top of a nearby house, gave its daily morning cry.

"Oh… hold on…" said a sleeping Ash. "Charmander… Those in the know say that's the best way to go…"

He threw yet another ball. "I choose you! Charmander!"

A crash woke him up. He gasped, seeing the busted Voltorb clock that he sleep-threw. "Oh no!" Ash cried, looking outside at the bright sun. "What time is it?!"

Ash ran down the road to Prof. Oak's lab.

"Squirtle, Bulbasaur, Charmander, anyone's fine, just please, save one for me!"

A large crowd was in front of the stairs to Prof. Oak's lab. Some cheerleaders stood at the front.

"Gary, Gary, he's our man, if he can't do it, no one can! Gary, Gary, he's our- Hey!"

Ash pushed through some cheering cheerleaders and fell backwards. "Aaaah!"

Someone in a blue long-sleeved shirt, jeans, and something around his neck, turned to him. "Hey, watch where you're going! Well, you must be Ash. Better late than never, I guess. At least you get the chance to meet me."

Ash stood up. "Gary?"

"Mr. Gary to you. Show some respect!" Gary's eyes got a little smaller. "Well, Ash, you snooze, you lose, and you're way behind, right from the start. I've got a Pokémon and you don't."

"You… got your first Pokémon?"

He pulled out a PokéBall, enlarged it, and began spinning it on his finger, all the while saying, "That's right, loser, and it's right here inside this PokéBall."

"Let's go, Gary, Let's go! Yeah, yeah! Let's go-" cheered the cheerleaders.

"Thank you, fans," said Gary, his arms raised up high. "Thank you all for this great honor! I promise you that I will become a Pokémon master, and make the town of Pallet known all 'round the world!" The crowd cheered.

"Excuse me?" Ash asked Gary.

"Yeah?"

"I was just wondering if you could tell me what kind of Pokémon you got."

"None of your business." Ash leaned backwards. "If you showed up on time, you would've saw that I got the best Pokémon from Professor Oak. It's good to have a grandfather in the Pokémon business, isn't it?" He got in the back of a shiny red car with no roof. As he and his cheerleading fan club slowly rode out of sight, he waved and said, "Thank you for coming out to see history in the making! Now I, Gary Oak, am off to learn the ways of the Pokémon Trainer!" The crowd followed the car out of sight.

Ash growled. "I'll show you…"

"So."

Ash jumped about a foot in the air. He turned around and saw Blaze.

"You're rivals with Mr. Hotshot, is that it? Well, you have fun with that."

"Very funny, Blaze."

"By the way, nice clothes," said Blaze, gesturing to Ash's pajamas.

"So, finally decided to show up after all," said Prof. Oak.

Ash jumped and turned around. "Oh! Professor Oak! Where's my Pokémon?

"Your Pokémon?"

"Yes, I'm ready!"

"You look like you're ready for bed, not for Pokémon training. I hope you don't think you're going to train in your pajamas," said Prof. Oak. Blaze chuckled.

"Oh, no, Professor. I got mixed up this morning, and- and I was a little late, but believe me: I'm ready for a Pokémon."

Blaze looked at Prof. Oak. "Hmmm… I think this journey might have a… _shocking _start, to say the least," said Blaze.

In Prof. Oak's lab, there was a cylindrical machine with a glass dome on top. The glass dome opened. Inside were three PokéBalls. Ash, Blaze, and Prof. Oak stood around the dome.

"I've thought about it a lot, and it took me a long time, but I've finally decided to choose…" Ash said as he picked up a PokéBall. "Squirtle!" The PokéBall was empty. "Ohhhohhh…"

"Already taken by someone who was on time," said Prof. Oak.

"Oh, I wish I hadn't overslept," said Ash, putting it back. He grabbed another ball. "But now I will choose as my Pokémon… Bulbasaur!" The ball was empty. "Wha-"

"That was also taken by a kid who wasn't late," said Prof. Oak.

"Oh. Well, that's no problem," he said, putting the ball back. He took the last one. "Because my Pokémon will be… Charmander!" It was empty, too. "Ahhhahhh!"

"The early bird gets the worm, or in this case, the Pokémon."

"Does that mean all the Pokémon are gone?"

"Well, there still is one left, but I, uh- "

Ash gasped. "Professor, I'll take it!"

A fourth PokéBall appeared from a hidden compartment. It had a small lightning bolt on the front. Prof. Oak picked it up. "I think I should warn you… There is a problem with this last one."

"I have to have a Pokémon."

"Well, in that case…" said Prof. Oak, handing the ball to Ash.

The PokéBall opened. A flashing light came out and settled on the machine on which the other three PokéBalls rested.

"Whoaaoooaaah!" gasped Ash.

The light revealed a yellow Pokémon with brown stripes on its back and jagged tail. It had red pouches on its cheeks.

The Pokémon blinked. "Pikachu," it said.

"Its name is Pikachu," said Prof. Oak.

"Oh! It's so cute, it's the best of all!" said Ash excitedly.

"You'll see," said Blaze and Prof. Oak together. "And if I get shocked," added Blaze, "you can very well expect a frying pan to the head, Ash Ketchum."

Ash reached for Pikachu and pulled him into a hug. "Oh, hi, Pikachu!"

Pikachu's eyes narrowed. "Pika." It closed its eyes. Its red cheek pouches sparked. Pikachu gave Ash a good long blast of electricity. Pikachu accidentally caught Blaze with the surge of yellow power as well. Ash and Blaze made squealing noises. While this was happening, Prof. Oak began to explain what a Pikachu was.

"It's also known as the electric mouse. It's usually shy, but can sometimes have an electrifying personality," said Prof. Oak. Pikachu stopped the blast.

"I see what you mean," said a smoking Ash.

An equally fried Blaze stretched and twisted. "Boy, that many volts tends to give me a crick in the neck," he said, pulling out his frying pan.

"Shocking, isn't it?" said Prof. Oak. "Now take these," he added to Ash, holding out a Pokédex in one hand, and six PokéBalls in the other. "Your Pokédex and PokéBalls."

Blaze began to swing the frying pan.

Ash could barely move. He slowly reached for the objects in Prof. Oak's hands. "Thank-"

Ash was cut short by two things. One was Blaze's frying pan. The other was a second blast of electricity by courtesy of Pikachu. Pikachu hit Ash the moment Blaze did, so the electricity traveled through the pan to Blaze. Ash also touched Prof. Oak the moment Pikachu hit Ash, so Prof. Oak was blasted as well.

"-YOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" Ash screamed.

"YOOOOOUUUUUUU'RE WELCOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMME! Oh, ohohoooooooooooooooo!" yelled Prof. Oak.

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LOOOOOOOOOOT MMMMMMMORE OFFFFFFFFFFFFFF THIIIIIIIISSSSSS INNNNNNNNNNNNNNN THE NNNNNNNNNEEEEEEAAAAAAAR FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUTUUUUUUURE, BUUUUUUUUUUUT I'LLLLLLLLLLLLLL SSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLL NNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEER BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE RRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYY FFFFFFFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRR IIIIIIIIIIIIIT!! (I see a lot more of this in the near future, but I'll still never be ready for it!)" screeched Blaze.

A group of people with tambourines, pots, pans, wooden spoons, and a banner saying "GO ASH GO!" were standing at the beginning of the stairs to the lab to give Ash a warm farewell, including Delia Ketchum.

Ash made it to the bottom of the stairs, Pikachu in his arms. Next to him was Prof. Oak, and on the other side was Blaze.

"Mom…" said a surprised Ash. He wasn't expecting something like this. He walked forward.

Blaze looked down. _I don't have anybody to cheer me on,_ he thought sadly.

"Oh, Ash, I'm so proud of you," said Delia, while Ash set Pikachu down. "You're finally going to fulfill your dream and start your Pokémon training." She was holding Ash's backpack. "But I'm- I'm going to miss you so much…" she said, hiding her face behind the backpack." Oh, my little boy…"

Pikachu took a step forward. "Pika-chu."

Delia unzipped the backpack. "I packed your sneakers and jeans," she said, putting some sneakers and jeans into Ash's arms, "nice clean shirts and underwear," putting those in top of the jeans and sneakers, "and your favorite snacks and some hot chocolate in case you want something hot, but be careful not to burn yourself, and a pair of rubber gloves to do your laundry, and a new clothesline to hang it out to dry, a-"

Ash could barely stand with so much on top of him. He grabbed the backpack from his mother and stuffed everything in it. "Mom, you're embarrassing me. In front of all these people? Don't you know I'm a big kid now? Pokémon Trainers can take care of themselves." Blaze snickered behind Ash.

"I understand." She looked down at Pikachu. "Hm? That's your Pokémon?"

"Pikachu," said Pikachu.

"Yep, that's my Pokémon."

Pikachu turned away. "Pi."

"Eh," said Ash with a sort of nervous smile on his face. "With Pikachu at my side, I'll get all the Pokémon in the world." He sounded very sure of himself.

"I thought all Pokémon stayed inside their PokéBalls. Why doesn't this one?" asked Delia.

"Uh, oh yeah, right." He pulled out Pikachu's PokéBall. "Pikachu, get in the ball now," he said, throwing the ball at Pikachu. Pikachu whacked it back to Ash with its tail. He caught it."Huh?"

He tried again. Pikachu kicked it back. Ash tried again. Pikachu sent it back with its head. Fourth try. Tail. Fifth try. Kick. Sixth try. Head. Seventh. Tail. Ash was making weird noises every time Pikachu sent it back.

"Oh, you're playing catch. You're friends already," said Delia. Blaze laughed behind Ash's back.

"Uh, sure." He turned around and stuck his tongue out at Blaze. Blaze responded with a shake of his frying pan.

Ash bent down and picked Pikachu up. "Pikachu and I are real pals," he said, looking at Pikachu. "Right?"

"But, it's a little weird…" commented Delia.

"Weird?" said Ash. Pikachu growled. Ash made an "errrrrrrrrr" noise. Blaze ducked behind Prof. Oak.

Pikachu blasted the entire group of people except Blaze and Prof. Oak. The crowd yelled.

"Those rubber gloves your mom packed will come in handy!" said Prof. Oak, clinging to a brick post that held the gate.

"Whyyyyyyyyy?"

"Rubber blocks electricity!"

"Hooooooorrraaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!"

The surge ended. Everybody fell to the ground except Ash, Blaze, and Prof. Oak.

"Don't forget to change your underwear… every single day," said a grounded Delia.

"Okay…" said a stunned Ash.

"Pikachu," said Pikachu.

Blaze whacked Ash on the head with the frying pan. Ash fell to the ground. Blaze smiled. "I could do this for a long time."

Ash and Blaze were walking up the road, Ash pulling Pikachu via clothesline behind him. He was wearing the rubber gloves, so as to avoid being shocked. Ash finally had real clothes on. Pikachu made grunting noises, trying to resist. Blaze was laughing.

Ash stopped and sighed. He turned to Pikachu. "Pikachu… Are you gonna be like this… the whole way?"

Pikachu turned away. "Pi."

Ash knelt. "Is it because you don't like me?"

Pikachu nodded. "Pikapika."

"Well, I like you a lot." Pikachu scratched its face with its foot. "And since you're the Pokémon I'm training," Ash said, while Pikachu licked its paw, "don't you think you could be a little nicer and just open your mouth and tell me what's wrong?"

Pikachu opened its mouth as wide as it could. "Cha."

"Uh, that's not exactly… what I meant… Is your name all you can say?"

Pikachu nodded once. "Pika."

Blaze sighed and lowered his head, hands to his face.

"Well then, you're just like all Pokémon, and you should act like one, and get inside the PokéBall, just like it says in the Pokédex." Ash opened the Pokédex. On the screen, it showed a picture of a PokéBall.

"While being trained, a Pokémon usually stays inside its PokéBall," said the Pokédex. The large blue light on the Pokédex flashed in sync with the voice.

"You see?"

Pikachu jumped up to the Pokédex and pressed a button. "Pika."

The Pokédex began to speak (and flash) again. "However, there are many exceptions. Some Pokémon hate being confined."

"Okay then," said Ash, putting his Pokédex back in his pocket. "This oughta make things better." He untied the clothesline from Pikachu. "And I'll get rid of these," he said, throwing the rubber gloves on top of the clothesline. He stuck out his finger at Pikachu. "How's that?"

Pikachu turned away. "Pi."

"Still not good enough?"

Pikachu nodded once. "Pi-ka."

Ash sighed.

By now, Blaze was bored out of his mind. He had taken out a PokéBall and started to spin it around on the ground. "Can we move on yet? Or do I have to whack some sense into you with my frying pan?" He pulled it out and waved it around tauntingly.

"Blaze!" Ash had completely forgotten. "What Pokémon did you get?"

"Hm… Blaze… Firedusk Darkblitz… Gotten a clue?"

"No idea."

"It starts with Char, and ends with Mander."

"Uh, I know, it's on the tip of my tongue-"

CLAAAAAAAAANG!

Ash held his head. "All right, all right. That really hurt… Oh, right. Can I see Charmander?"

Blaze picked up the PokéBall he was spinning and threw it in the air. "Come on out, Charmander!"

A Charmander stood before them, tail brightly burning. "Charmander," it said.

"Wow, how cool!" said Ash.

Pikachu walked up to Charmander. "Pikapika."

"Char char mander. Char."

"Pika?

"Char."

Blaze knelt down next to Charmander. "Are you and Pikachu getting along?"

"Char," it said, smiling. Its eyes suddenly squinted.

"What's the matter?" asked Blaze.

Charmander pointed at some grass nearby. "Charmander."

Blaze saw a Pidgey walk by. Ash and Pikachu heard it, and turned. "Huh?" said Ash, wondering what it was.

Everybody stood up. Ash and Pikachu saw it. The Pidgey stopped and looked around.

"A Pidgey," said Ash, holding his Pokédex open.

The Pokédex began to speak. "Pidgey is a Flying Pokémon. Among all the Flying Pokémon, it is the gentlest, and easiest to capture, a perfect target for the beginning Pokémon Trainer to test its Pokémon's skills." It had a picture of Pidgey on the screen.

"This is great," said Ash. "It's… our lucky day!" He put his Pokédex away. "Pikachu, go get it."

Pikachu turned away. "Chu."

"Aren't you ever gonna listen to me?"

"Chu."

"But why not?"

Pikachu ran toward a nearby tree and climbed to a fairly high branch, saying "Pika" all the way. It yawned. "Chaa." Blaze laughed.

"Okay, I get the message," said Ash angrily. "I don't want your help, or need it! I can get that thing all by myself!"

Blaze and Charmander were standing by Pikachu's tree. Blaze looked up at Pikachu. "This oughta be interesting," he said, grinning.

"Pika," agreed Pikachu.

Ash dropped his bag at the base of the tree and grabbed one of the PokéBalls on his belt. "All, right, I've pledged to get all the Pokémon in the world. Now I'm ready to take the next step to be the number one…" He enlarged the PokéBall. "…Pokémon master."

The Pidgey looked at Ash.

"Enjoy your last moments of freedom, Pidgey, 'cause you're mine!" said Ash. He turned his hat backwards. "PokéBall, go!" he said, throwing the PokéBall.

It hit Pidgey. Pidgey was sucked into the PokéBall via red beam of light.

"I did it!" said Ash. His eyes suddenly became wide. "Huh?"

The PokéBall began to shake. The button on the PokéBall was glowing red.

Ash clenched his fists. He stared at the ball, hoping dearly that this would work.

The PokéBall suddenly jolted open. A white light was left. Ash caught the PokéBall. The white light turned into Pidgey. It began to run away.

Ash sighed. "I blew it." Pikachu laughed.

Suddenly, Blaze jumped out of nowhere. Pidgey turned around.

"Charmander, use Scratch!" said Blaze, pointing at Pidgey.

Charmander jumped at Pidgey. "Charrrrr…" He landed and scratched Pidgey across the face. "Mander!"

"Now use Ember!"

"Chaaaar!" said Charmander, spitting red-hot embers at Pidgey. "Piiiidgeeey!" yelled Pidgey.

Blaze pulled a PokéBall out of his backpack. He enlarged it. "PokéBall, let's go!" he said, throwing it at Pidgey.

Pidgey was sucked into the PokéBall. It began to shake, but soon stopped. It made a high-tech locking noise. It flew back to Blaze, who caught it.

"All right!" "Char!" Blaze and Charmander jumped into the air and gave each other a high-five. "You caught us a new buddy, Charmander!" said Blaze.

"Char!" said Charmander happily.

"To capture a Pokémon," said Ash's Pokédex, showing a picture of a PokéBall, "you usually have your own Pokémon battle with the other."

"Now he tells me," said Ash.

Blaze, Charmander, and Pikachu were all on the ground (or a branch, in Pikachu's case), clutching their stomachs, they were laughing so hard.

Ash's head turned to look at Pikachu. "But I have to do everything myself," he said angrily. He suddenly looked at his backpack. "Wait!" he said. "I've got an idea!"

Ash tiptoed quietly toward another Pidgey. "Okay, just be quiet," he told himself, holding his nightshirt. "There's nothing to be afraid of…"

The Pidgey looked at Ash.

Ash gave a nervous open-mouthed smile. He stood absolutely still. "Hi, little friend," he said.

"SORRY, BUDDY!" cried Ash as he covered the Pidgey with his pajamas. Pidgey and Ash struggled. Suddenly, the shirt began to inflate, and very quickly, too.

Ash's eyes got wide. He yelled as a tornado came out and blew his pajamas backwards. He spun around the tornado for a moment, and then was thrown backwards as well.

He got up and gasped. "What happened?"

His Pokédex, which was in his pocket, began to speak. "Pidgey's Gust power creates tornados. It also has a Sand-Attack."

"Sand?!" cried Ash. He was immediately covered in a cloud of sand. Pidgey flew up out of the sand cloud, and flew away.

Ash quit coughing. He blinked. He was covered in sand. "Guess it's not my lucky day."

Blaze and Pikachu were still laughing. Charmander was laughing so hard that Blaze had to send it back to its PokéBall, to avoid hurting itself.

Ash growled at Pikachu. He suddenly noticed a purple Pokémon digging around in his backpack. "Hey! Get out of there!"

The Pokémon looked up and ran away. Ash ran after it, but he stopped and growled.

"A forest Pokémon, Rattata," said Ash's Pokédex. Rattata turned around and hissed. "It likes cheese, nuts, fruits, and berries."

"Yeah, but this isn't a forest," Ash said. "It's an open field." Rattata kept running.

"It also comes out into open fields to steal food from _stupid_ travelers," said the Pokédex.

"That means… I-I'm stupid?"

Blaze and Pikachu were laughing harder than ever. Ash growled at Pikachu. Suddenly, Blaze jumped up and ran after Rattata, throwing a PokéBall in the air. Pidgey came out. Blaze caught the PokéBall.

"Pidgey, use Sand-Attack, and then use Gust!"

Pidgey did so. Rattata was left sprawling on the ground.

Blaze threw a PokéBall at it. "PokéBall, let's go!"

The PokéBall encased Rattata and stopped shaking almost immediately. It made the locking noise.

"Yeah!" Blaze jumped, punching the air. He picked up Rattata's PokéBall. He returned Pidgey. "I haven't even been on my journey for fifteen minutes, and I've already caught two Pokémon!" He put the balls away.

"Pidgey."

Ash turned. "Huh?

Three Pidgey were standing nearby. Ash picked up a small rock and threw it at them, yelling very loudly. The Pidgey scattered. Ash sighed.

At first, this had been hilarious in Blaze's point of view. But now, he could see another Pokémon that wouldn't take kindly to a rock to the head. "Ash, don't throw any more rocks. You could be attacked. Or worse… I could be attacked… for no reason…"

Ash didn't listen. He spotted the Pokémon that Blaze was worried about. He thought it was a Pidgey. "I'll get you this time," he said, tossing around another rock.

He threw it as hard as he could. He made a noise.

The rock hit the Pokémon right on the head.

"I got it!" said Ash.

A large bump appeared on the back of the Pokémon's head. It turned to look at him. It was seriously mad, and its eye glinted with anger. "Ro?" it said quietly, yet angrily.

Blaze looked surprised. "I thought Ash's aim was terrible." He suddenly realized what had happened. "Oh, joy," he said dully. "Oh bliss. Gee, I'm going to be attacked viciously, how swell can things get?"

"I wonder what that is," said Ash. He pulled out his Pokédex. It showed a picture of the Pokémon on the screen.

"Unlike Pidgey," it said, "Spearow has a terrible attitude. It is very wild, and will sometimes attack other Pokémon and humans."

Ash became very worried. He made another "errrrrrr" noise. The Spearow took off and headed straight for Ash. He turned around, ran, and dove toward his backpack. Spearow barely missed him. He jumped up. He tried to knock Spearow away with the backpack, but it didn't really help that much. Pikachu was still sitting on the branch.

Spearow did a somersault up the tree, turned around, and headed straight for Pikachu. Pikachu ducked, but Spearow wouldn't give up. It tried again, from the other side. Pikachu ran to the left of Spearow, toward the main trunk of the tree.

Ash was holding his Pokédex in one hand, and his backpack in the other. He began to yell at Spearow. "Hey! Leave Pikachu alone! It didn't throw the rock!"

"Wild Pokémon tend to be jealous of human-trained Pokémon," said Ash's Pokédex.

"Oh."

Pikachu ducked and covered its head to avoid Spearow's third swoop. Spearow, however, was very intent on attacking Ash and Pikachu. Blaze, it didn't really care about. If Blaze got in the way, then Spearow would take him out.

Spearow dove for Pikachu for the fourth time around. Pikachu fell backwards. It caught the branch, but only just. Spearow turned around for the finale. It flew toward the dangling Pikachu at blinding speed. "Speeeeaaaaar!" it cried.

"Pikachu!" yelled Ash.

Pikachu sent a good blast of electricity Spearow's way.

"Speeeeeeeeaaaaaaar!" The smoking bird dropped.

"You got it!" said Ash.

"I feel your pain, Spearow," said Blaze. "Geez, with Pikachu around, nobody ever gets a break."

Pikachu sent a Thundershock at Blaze.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Blaze. "Right in the chest!" He dropped like a rock. "I lied. Pikachu breaks everything," he gasped.

Pikachu gave him a Thunderbolt.

"Wowwwww," croaked a smoking Blaze. "Seeing Thunderbolt on TV is one thing, but personal experience is something else. I'm impressed."

Spearow stood up. "Spearow!" it called.

A huge flock of Spearow came out of a tree a few hundred yards away.

The pupils in Blaze's eyes seemed to shrink to the size of a speck of dust. Within seconds, he was gone.

Ash turned to Pikachu. "Should we run?"

"Pikachu." Pikachu nodded quickly.

Ash and Pikachu were running as fast as they could, the flock of Spearow not far behind.

While Blaze was sprinting for safety, he noticed a group of Sandshrew nearby. He sent out Pidgey.

"Use Gust, Pidgey!" said Blaze.

Two ducked, but one was thrown into the air.

"PokéBall, go!" Blaze threw a PokéBall at the Sandshrew. It caught and locked in the Sandshrew.

Blaze caught and put away Sandshrew's PokéBall.

He knew he had to stop the Spearow. But how? _Pidgey's Sand-Attack won't work against Spearow, _he thought, _but Gust might help. So would Quick Attack._

"Pidgey, use Gust!"

"Pidgeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyey!" Pidgey sent large blasts of wind at the Spearow. It whirled them around and made them confused, but Ash and Pikachu had to dive off the path to dodge the gale.

"Use Quick Attack!"

Pidgey cut through the flock, knocking the Spearow into each other. Several fell to the ground. Blaze captured about four Spearow with his PokéBalls. Two of the PokéBalls disappeared. _Hmmm… I knew you could only carry six Pokémon in your party at once, _he thought, _but I didn't know how Prof. Oak would get the rest. Heh… Guess I just figured out. _He caught the other two in his backpack (thanks to a few breezes sent his way by Pidgey) and kept running. _If things keep going like this, I'll go broke buying PokéBalls, _he thought. "Return, Pidgey!" he said, bringing Pidgey back to its PokéBall.

Blaze was much faster than Ash was, even with a bulky backpack, so Blaze wasn't really having any trouble with the Spearow. _Hey, I just thought of something… The Blaze of fire goes by in the blink of an eye, and leaves only Ash behind. _He chuckled and kept going.

He noticed four Mankey hanging on the branches of a nearby tree. He sent out the two Spearow and Pidgey. He told Pidgey to use Quick Attack and the Spearow to use Peck. The Mankey were sent flying. Blaze caught three of them. Every PokéBall disappeared.

Unlike Blaze, Ash wasn't really enjoying himself that much. Neither was Pikachu. The Spearow were nearly on top of them. Some more Mankey watched the chase go by. The Mankey seemed to think that this was very amusing.

"Don't worry, Pikachu!" said Ash. "No matter what, I'll save you!"

"Pikachu." Pikachu began running ahead of Ash.

"Don't run ahead! I said I'd protect- Ow!" A Spearow had dove straight for Ash's head.

Up ahead, the Spearow were pecking Pikachu out of its wits. "Pikapika!"

"Leave it alone, Spearows!"

Blaze heard what was happening. "Ash, Spearow in the plural form is still Spearow, not Spearows! Oh, good grief, can't you do anything yourselves?" He sent Pidgey out. "Pidgey, use Gust!"

Pidgey sent the Spearow flying into each other. Nevertheless, Pikachu still could not avoid being pecked, and eventually dropped. "Pika!" it cried. It was in bad shape.

"Obviously, these Spearow don't believe in fair fights," said Blaze. "Gust, again, Pidgey!"

Pidgey sent some more Spearow spinning, but they weren't giving up. The Spearow covered Pikachu.

Ash flailed his way through the flock. "Pikachu!" He picked the weak Pikachu up and kept running.

Blaze began to tease Ash. "Well, at least you're getting some exercise. You know, I've been meaning to take a jog now and then, but-" He suddenly noticed Pikachu. His face turned serious. "Pikachu's in bad shape, Ash! We've gotta get it outta here now!"

Blaze was still very far ahead of Ash. He came to a rocky waterfall. "Pidgey!" he yelled. Pidgey came down to greet him. "Pidgey," it said.

"Pidgey, I'm going this way. Cover me from above, okay?"

"Pidgey." It spiraled high.

Blaze knew it'd be stupid to dive headfirst, so he simply jumped. He noticed a Magikarp nearby, and caught it without battling it. Its PokéBall disappeared. He noticed a Gyarados swimming toward him, fast. Blaze took a sharp detour.

Ash made it to the waterfall. He looked back. The Spearow weren't far behind. He turned his hat backwards. "Well, here we go." He jumped. "Aaaaaaaaa-"

SPLASH.

The current was extremely fast. Ash went straight by another Magikarp. The same Gyarados that Blaze met was heading straight for Ash. He gasped and swam the other way.

Blaze heaved himself up onto land. He coughed. _Boy, that was cold,_ he thought.

A girl was fishing nearby. She noticed him lying on his back, coughing every now and then. She stuck her fishing rod between two rocks and ran up to him. "Are you all right?"

He sat up. "I'll be fine." He sighed. "My friend back there made a flock of Spearow really mad, so I had to jump off the waterfall to make it. My Pidgey covered me from above."

Pidgey came down to rest on a rock near Blaze. Blaze stroked Pidgey. "Thanks, buddy." He continued his story. "His Pikachu's in bad shape. I'm not sure where he is…"

Just then, the girl's fishing rod began to bend. She ran to it and tugged on it. "Hey, I got a bite! Oh, wow, I really think this could be a big one!" She stood up and pulled as hard as she could. Ash flew out of the water… "Whoooaaaaaa!" …and landed right on top of Blaze. He coughed.

"Nah, it's just a kid. Oh, and a Pokémon!" She jumped down. "Oh, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay," said Ash.

_What a loser, _thought a squashed Blaze.

"Not you! Look what you've done to that poor little thing!" She gasped. "Is it breathing?"

"Uh- I- I think so…"

_Well, I'm not,_ thought Blaze.

"Well, just don't sit there, it needs a doctor right away! There's a medical center not too far from here, you've got to get moving now!"

Ash stood up, Pikachu in his arms. "You mean a hospital?"

_If you're gonna stand, don't stand on me, _thought Blaze.

"Yes, for Pokémon!"

"Um, can you tell me, which way do I go?"

She pointed down a path. "That way."

They turned around to see a flock of Spearow appear over a forest across the river.

"They're coming back!" cried Ash.

_We can see that, genius,_ thought Blaze.

"Run!" yelled Ash. He stepped on Blaze's face. He ran up to the path and set Pikachu in the basket of the girl's bike.

"Hey, what are you doing?!" cried the girl.

Ash got on the bike. "I'm borrowing this." He rode away.

"Hey, that's my bike!"

_We kinda figured that out on our own, you know, _thought Blaze.

"I'll give it back someday," yelled Ash.

"Oh, you!" said the girl angrily.

A dazed Blaze stood up. "Thanks for telling him to get off of me."

"Sorry."

"I'll go get him. Come on, Pidgey!" Pidgey followed him as he ran out of sight.

Black clouds filled the sky. Thunder roared. Ash was cycling through a field as hard as he could, but Blaze still caught up. "You know, that girl's gonna kill you for that! You're gonna wreck the bike, and you won't be able to pay her back!"

"Can we discuss this later?!"

"Pikachu," said Pikachu hoarsely.

"Just hang on now, Pikachu, we're almost there!"

It began to rain. The Spearow were catching up. Blaze called Pidgey back to its PokéBall to avoid being hurt by the Spearow.

Blaze ran ahead. The Spearow began attacking Ash.

Blaze jumped off the ledge at the end of the field and landed on the path. The next thing he knew, he had been crushed by a bike.

Ash had gone straight off the ledge on the bike. The bike slid to the right, sending Ash and Pikachu flying. Ash gasped with pain. Blaze was now in as bad shape as Pikachu, only completely unconscious.

Ash winced and groaned. A few feet away lay a motionless Pikachu. Lightning lit up the sky.

"Pikachu!" Ash crawled over to the poor little yellow Pokémon. Ash put his hand on Pikachu.

"Chu," Pikachu said softly.

"Pikachu, this can't… happen…"

The Spearow were approaching, fast.

Ash pulled out Pikachu's PokéBall. He held it out to Pikachu. "Pikachu, get inside."

"Chu?" Ash enlarged the PokéBall.

"I know you're afraid of going in there, but if you're inside, maybe I can save you. Please, Pikachu, please listen to me and go inside. After that, then, after that, just trust me!" He set the PokéBall down in front of Pikachu.

"Pika," Pikachu whispered.

Ash stood up to face the Spearow, his arms open wide.

"Spearows, do you know who I am?"

Blaze slowly opened his eyes. He winced. "It's Spearow, genius, not Spearows," he said softly. "I told you already." Blaze couldn't even move.

"I am Ash, from the town of Pallet," Ash continued. "I'm destined to be the world's number one Pokémon master. I can't be defeated by the likes of you."

Pikachu's eyes widened. It began to get up.

"I'm going to capture and defeat you all! You hear me?"

"You're all bark and no bite, buster," muttered Blaze. He winced again.

"Pikachu, go inside the PokéBall, it's the only way!"

Lightning lit up the sky.

"Come and get me!"

The flock of Spearow dove at Ash.

Pikachu ran to Ash, climbed up his back, jumped at the Spearow, and…

Ash gasped.

"Oh, no," whispered a petrified Blaze.

"PikaCHUUUUUUUUUUU!"

"Whaaaaaa!" Ash was thrown backwards.

Pikachu had let out one of the largest and most powerful electric attacks that anyone had ever seen. A humongous column of electricity split the black sky. The rain stopped, and the clouds parted.

The bike was completely fried. It was partially melted, and black all over.

Ash opened his eyes. Pikachu widened his.

"Kachu," Pikachu whispered.

"Well, we beat 'em," said Ash.

"Chu," Pikachu nodded once.

A golden Pokémon appeared in the sky. It was huge. It beat its wings with grace and power. It flew toward a rainbow.

Ash and Pikachu watched it.

"What's that?" he asked.

His Pokédex lay next to him. "There is no data," it said. "There are still Pokémon yet to be identified."

Ash walked down the path, carrying Pikachu. Pikachu licked Ash's face, and slowly drifted off to sleep, as Ash approached the huge city ahead of him.

**How about it, Ash?**

**Ash: I'm kinda busy...**

**Blaze: Geez, fine, I'll do it. REVIEW.**

**Thank you.**


	3. Hancock?

**Hiya! The reason why I called this Hancock is because towards the end, Blaze starts to act like Hancock. (Hancock? You know, the movie?) Anyway, cheers. And this chapter is dedicated to pikachuhunter1! Thanks for the reviews! Anyway, cheers!**

"Attention citizens of Viridian City!" called a voice over a series of intercoms. "Attention citizens of Viridian City! We have reports of possible Pokémon thieves in our area. Be on the lookout for suspicious-looking strangers. Repeat, be on the lookout for suspicious-looking- Huh?" The policewoman moved the speaker she was holding away from her face and looked out the window. "Speak of the devil?!"

A boy was running into the city with an injured Pikachu in his arms.

"Hold it!" The policewoman grabbed him by the collar.

"Wah!" The boy waved his feet wildly.

"And just where do you think you're going with that Pokémon, young man?"

The boy wiggled free. "It's my Pokémon, and it's hurt, and I've gotta get it to the hospital right away!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," said the officer, bending over to look at the Pikachu. "I thought you might be stealing it. Show me your I.D. and you can go."

"I.D.? Uh- I don't have any. You see, we just came here from Pallet and-"

"You know, you're the fourth person I've seen today from Pallet Town."

"The fourth? Oh. That means Gary Oak's here already."

"It's very unusual for someone to carry a Pokémon around in his arms and not in a PokéBall. How do I know you didn't steal that Pokémon? Especially since you don't have any identification." A **WANTED** sign behind the boy showed two people with R's on their shirts.

"Please let me through. I wouldn't steal a Pokémon and I've gotta get Pikachu to the hospital. Please, miss."

The officer suddenly noticed a Pokédex in the boy's pocket. "Hey! What's that in your pocket?"

"What? Oh, this?" he asked, holding up his Pokédex.

The officer snatched it away from him. "This! This is perfect! A Pokédex!" she said, holding it out. "This will solve our problem!"

The boy blinked.

"Let's see," she said, pressing some buttons, "if you're the real deal."

"I'm Dexter," said the Pokédex, "Pokédex programmed by (Ash took the Pokédex back) Professor Oak for Pokémon Trainer Ash Ketchum of the town of Pallet. My function is to provide Ash with information and advice regarding Pokémon and their training. If lost or stolen, I cannot be replaced." The screen on the Pokédex showed a picture of the boy.

"Oh, my Pokédex," said Ash. "I didn't realize it was also my I.D. Can I take Pikachu to the Pokémon Center now?"

"I'll get you there in no time at all." She winked.

A garage door opened, revealing the officer on a motorcycle and Ash and Pikachu in a sidecar.

"Sit back, hold on, and don't yell," said the officer. She stepped on a pedal.

The motorcycle zoomed out of the garage and down the road, leaving a trail of black smoke behind. "Whoaaaaa!" yelled Ash.

The smoke cleared to reveal a girl holding a black, melted bike. She coughed. "Hey! What's the big idea?!" She growled. "Come back here!" she yelled, running after them.

A hook was lowered from the sky. It tore the picture off of the **WANTED **sign and brought it back up to the hot air balloon from which it came. The balloon was the spitting image of a Meowth's face.

"A wanted poster," said a voice. "How flattering."

"Flattering?" said another voice. "This picture makes me look terrible."

"Then you should be happy that the photographer captured the real you." The first voice revealed itself to be the maroon-haired woman in the photo, complete with R costume.

"Exactly." The second voice turned out to be the indigo-haired man in the photo, complete with R costume.

"We'll show these bumpkins."

"The people of Viridian City will be sorry they ever saw this face."

A Meowth opened its eyes and began to speak. "We're all sorry to see your face. Stay focused. We're here to capture rare and unusual Pokémon. Don't forget, Meowth!"

"Absolutely," said the woman.

"But of course," said the man.

"And just remember," said Meowth, "I'm the top cat."

"You got it," said the man.

"Meowth!"

--

It was dusk, and Ash and the officer were still on their way to the Pokémon center.

"There it is," said the officer.

They were approaching a huge dome-shaped building.

"Pokémon Center…" said Ash. "It's gigantic."

"This is tricky," said the officer. "Just hold on! Here we go!"

The bike went up the stairs and made a huge jump.

"Whooooaaaaaaa!"

The bike skidded sideways toward the automatic doors. They opened, and the bike stopped at the front desk.

"We have a driveway, you know," said the nurse.

"It's a Pokémon emergency!" said the officer.

Ash stood up. "Please, help it!"

"Looks like a Pikachu," said the nurse. "We'll do what we can." She began typing on her computer. "I need a stretcher for a small electric Pokémon. Stat!"

Two Chansey with a stretcher walked in from a hallway. "Chansey," they said.

The nurse put Pikachu on the stretcher.

"It'll be okay," said the nurse soothingly. "Rush this Pokémon to the critical care unit," she said to the Chansey.

"Chansey," they said. They walked toward a hallway.

The nurse pulled on a pair of sterile gloves. "We'll begin the treatment right away." Another Chansey stood next to her, holding a tray of medical supplies.

"Uh-" Ash stepped forward.

"Who are you?" the nurse asked.

"His name is Ash," said the officer. "He's the Pokémon's Trainer."

"If there's anything I can do," said Ash, "please just tell me."

"You can be more responsible," said the nurse curtly.

"Oh?"

"If you want to be a Pokémon Trainer, young man, you don't let your Pokémon battle until it's in this condition."

"But you don't know what happened!"

"What's past is past. Now we have to heal your Pikachu."

"What can I do?"

"Just leave everything to me."

"Please…" said Ash.

The officer raised her hand to her forehead in a salute. "It's in your hands. I know you'll give the Pokémon excellent care."

"You got it here just in time," said the nurse.

"That's my job," said the officer, resting her salute. "Oh my goodness," she said suddenly. "I left my motorcycle parked at the front desk!"

"Next time use the driveway," said the nurse kindly.

The officer chuckled nervously and ran off.

"Ash, you'll have to go to the waiting room," said the nurse.

"Can't I-"

The automatic doors slid shut.

_Pikachu,_ thought Ash.

--

The clock above Ash's head struck eight, and a green cuckoo Pidgey popped out. "Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey, Pidgey."

Ash looked up. He saw three video telephones on the other side of the room. "I'll call home," said Ash.

--

The videophone at the Ketchum residence began to make noise. "Ring ring ring! Ring ring ring! Phone call! Phone call! Ring ring ring! Ring ring ring! Phone call! Phone-"

Delia pressed a button. "Hello? This is the Ketchum residence."

"Hello- Mom?"

Delia gasped. She ripped off the towel on her head and the mask on her face. "Oh, hi honey! Is everything okay?"

The face of Delia showed up on Ash's end. "Where are you, Ash?" asked Delia.

"The Pokémon Center in Viridian City."

"You're already in Viridian City? It took your father four days to get there when he started Pokémon training. Oh, he'll be so proud. You're the apple of his eye."

"Yeah, a rotten apple."

"Oh, Ash, don't get discouraged. You're doing fine! Honey, you're growing up right before my eyes, spreading your wings and soaring like a Spearow."

Ash tilted his head to one side. "I feel more like a fallen Pidgey."

"I won't let you talk about yourself that way! Just be confident! You can do anything that you set your mind to. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"And are you changing your underwear every day?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Good night, son." She waved. "I love you."

"Me too, Mom. Bye." He was about to hang up.

"Just a minute, Ash."

"Yes?"

"I almost forgot- Where's Blaze?"

Ash's stomach seemed to melt. "Oh no! I haven't seen him since I ran over- I mean, uh… since I ran over to Viridian City! I've gotta go!"

CRASH.

"AAAAAAAAA-"

CRASH.

"WAAAAAAA-"

THUD.

Someone had just fallen through the roof, gone through the floor, and crashed in the basement. The holes in the floor and ceiling were in the shape of a person a little older than Ash.

"Ash, what was that?" asked Delia.

"Someone just fell through the ceiling, and the floor, and landed in the basement."

"Who is it? Do you know?"

Ash looked into the basement. He saw someone with a black hat, dark brown hair with streaks of red in it, red and black clothes, and a black backpack. There was a huge black mark up one leg, across his jacket and backpack, and on the side of his face. The someone was burnt, bloody, wet, and dirty all at the same time.

Ash stammered. "I-It-Iiiit's-B-Bla-Blaze," he said, horrified.

"WHAT?"

"I'll take care of it- I mean him. Bye, Mom!" He hung up.

He looked down into the basement. There was a hole in the basement floor about six inches deep, and in it lay Blaze, completely unconscious.

Ash couldn't believe it. Was he okay? No, of course not, he fell through a roof, a ceiling, a floor, and made a hole in the basement. "Blaze?"

The officer ran in. "I saw something fall through the roof. What happened?"

Ash pointed to the hole.

The officer put a hand over her mouth. "Oh no… Do you know this poor young man, Ash?"

Ash seemed to shrink to half his size. "I travel with him."

Just then, Blaze began to get up. He was a mess. He looked up, and fell backwards.

He held his head. "I guess, if you're a character in a book, you can survive anything if they want you to." He wiped the blood off his face and winced. "Still hurts like nothing else." He saw the officer. "Uh, hello, ma'am." He looked around. "I don't mean to be rude, but I could use some help."

--

Five minutes later, Blaze was resting on the bench in the waiting room.

"I just realized… I saw you earlier today," said the officer. "You were the first one from Pallet."

"The first?" asked Ash.

"Yep," groaned Blaze, "and I sure wish I wasn't. Let's see… I had run ahead of you, jumped off that ledge, and then you jumped off the ledge with that girl's bike and landed on yours truly. While you were having your emotional time with Pikachu, I was unconscious. I woke up when you said 'Spearows, do you know who I am?' and I said 'It's Spearow, genius, not Spearows. I told you already.' and then you said 'I am Ash, from the town of Pallet. I'm destined to be the world's number one Pokémon master. I can't be defeated by the likes of you. I'm going to capture and defeat you all! You hear me?' and then I said 'You're all bark and no bite, buster.' and then you said 'Pikachu, go inside the PokéBall, it's the only way!' to Pikachu, and then you said 'Come and get me!' and then they dove at you, and then Pikachu jumped at the Spearow, and then I said "Oh no.' and then Pikachu blasted everything." He sighed. "You remember that rainbow Pokémon?"

"Yeah," said Ash.

Blaze pointed to a screen on the wall. It had four stone carvings of Pokémon on it, all of which Blaze recognized from his books and nightmares. Blaze knew that he couldn't tell Ash what they were, but he felt that Ash would find out sooner or later anyway. One of the carvings was of the rainbow Pokémon that Ash and Pikachu (and apparently, Blaze as well) saw flying over the rainbow.

"Hey." Ash ran to the front desk to look at it. "Wow." _That's the flying Pokémon I saw._

"Yeah, that's the one and only, Ash," said Blaze, as if he had read Ash's mind.

_Maybe he can read minds, _Ash thought. _It sure seems like it._

"Yep. Boy, that sucker can cook," said Blaze. "It burnt the Blaze down to Ash."

Ash's head fell like a rock. "Uhhhhh…."

"I haven't heard a good pun from you yet. Who are you to stare at me with your mouth open like that? Some Pokémon's gonna crawl right up your shirt without you noticing, nest in that huge hole in your face, and lay a dozen eggs that all die from that sickness you've had all your poor short painful life, you little loser, you disgusting little Trainer wannabe."

Ash was speechless.

Blaze smiled weakly. "You ain't seen nothingyet." He scratched his chin. "Now where was I? Oh yeah. So, I was flying through the sky, wondering when I would get the next chance to whack Ash with my frying pan, when I saw that Pokémon. I took some pictures." He held up a camera. "I land on its back. It throws me off and sends this raging inferno at me. I've never seen so much fire. I get roasted and sent flying once again. I see Viridian City up ahead. I hit the road and start bouncing everywhere."

The officer cut in. "You stopped right near my office. You showed me your I.D. and I let you go."

Blaze winced and rubbed his shoulder. "And then Gary and his fan club showed up with their car. The one who drives it is such a clueless, idiotic loser. The car knocks me flying."

The officer was shocked. "How could… I… they should be arrested under hit-and-run charges!"

"You'll never catch them the way those suckers drive."

"We'll catch them, just you wait, Blaze."

"Anyway, I was flying through the air, and I landed in the river. This Gyarados smacks me with its tail up in the air. Then it catches me with a Twister and sends me spinning for who knows how long, and as soon as I thought it was over, the Gyarados hits a home run with Hyper Beam. I get sent right above the Pokémon Center. Then I crash through the roof, the ceiling, the floor, and land in the basement." He thought. "You know, the basement floor seemed softer than cement. I mean, I left a six-inch depression in it, right?" His head hit the bench like a rock. "So, that's my flight lesson."

Ash thought. "To send you flying all the way over here, Pikachu must have some serious power."

CLAAAAANG!

Ash fell into the basement (but didn't leave a depression) with the shape of a frying pan on his face.

"Along with the help of that humongous blast of fire from that legendary Pokémon, Gary's car, and Gyarados's Twister and Hyper Beam, yeah, you're right, Ash," said Blaze sarcastically.

After a while, Ash finally got out. "Why'd you do that?"

"One, you're stupid. Two, I'm supposed to be the main character in this story. Three, you're stupid."

"But I'm the protagonist!" said Ash in despair.

"This ain't the anime," said Blaze simply. "But you'll probably end up being focused on the most anyway." He sighed. "That's pretty much how it always ends up. I'm probably just a running gag in this story."

_I wouldn't bet on it, _said a voice in his head.

"I'm gone," said the officer. She left.

Ash sweatdropped. "Ten minutes ago you were in a hole in the basement, and now nobody cares anymore."

"That's basically what I just said," muttered Blaze. He stretched, yawned, and winced. "Ouch."

"You okay?"

WHAP.

Ash was holding his head again.

"What do you think, genius?"

"Genius? You've got British humor in your blood."

"Think so?"

"It's probably 'cause you just hit me in the head that I thought that."

Blaze sighed. "I'm gone," he said.

He was about to leave when something interrupted him.

"RING RING RING! RING RING RING! PHONE CALL!"

Ash was confused. "Huh?"

Blaze elbowed him. "The videophone, weirdo."

"PHONE CALL! RING RING TING! RING RING RING! PHONE CALL! PHONE CALL! RING RING RING! RING RING RING!"

Ash pressed a button on the videophone/computer keyboard.

A screen popped up. It had a sign that said **VOICE ONLY**.

"Uh, this is Ash. Who's calling?"

Blaze smacked his forehead. "Argh! Do you always answer calls like this?"

"Here!" said a voice from across the room. "I'm over here!"

Blaze arched an eyebrow. "Huh?"

A stone carving picture on the screen across the room lowered to reveal a monitor. On it was Prof. Oak with his back to the screen. He was looking at his videophone, which revealed a bewildered Ash.

"Ash, it's Professor Oak! Don't you recognize me?"

"No, Professor, I didn't recognize the back of your head."

Blaze sweatdropped. Wow, what a weird guy.

"Eh?!" Prof. Oak turned to look at the screen that he previously had his back to. "Oops! I – wrong camera-" He began fiddling with something.

The monitor turned to static, and soon, Prof. Oak's face appeared on the screen.

"There." He cleared his throat. "I just spoke to your mother, and she tells me you've made it to the Pokémon Center in Viridian City. Is that correct?"

Blaze put his face in his hands. _Why me?_

"I couldn't be talking to you if I wasn't here," said Ash.

"You couldn't be talking if you – Oh! I see. I dialed the Pokémon Center in Viridian City, and you were able to answer."

"Yeah, because that's where I am."

"Mhmm, I suppose that proves it. The other Pokémon Trainers made it here with no problem, and –"

"HELLO?!" Blaze was livid. **(Love that word. Livid. ;D) "**I'M COVERED IN DIRT, BLOOD, SWEAT, AND A SKID MARK FROM A BUSTED BIKE, AND YOU SAY I GOT HERE WITH NO PROBLEM?! UNLESS YOU'VE FORGOTTEN THAT I'M A TRAINER TOO!"

Prof. Oak was confused. "What?"

"I DID NOT MAKE IT HERE WITH NO PROBLEM, PROFESSOR!"

"Okay, okay! Sorry! As I was saying, I'm personally surprised you got there so soon! I admit, when you left, I had my doubts that you could handle your Pikachu."

Ash's face fell.

"But, when my grandson Gary said that you wouldn't have a single new Pokémon by the time you got to Viridian City…"

Ash's lower lip quivered.

"…I bet him a million dollars that he'd be wrong!"

Ash sweatdropped. Blaze swallowed a snigger.

"Well, money isn't everything, right?" said Ash uneasily.

Prof. Oak's reaction made Blaze snicker. "Oh, why do I even bother?"

"Contrary to popular belief, Ash, being in a lifelong debt to your grandson IS everything," said Blaze, stifling a giggle.

"But I did see a flying Pokémon like that one!" said Ash, pointing to the picture of the carving right above Prof. Oak's screen.

"We saw," muttered Blaze.

"It flew right over the rainbow!"

"Don't talk such nonsense," said Prof. Oak. "You couldn't've seen this Pokémon. Trainers have searched their whole lives and never seen it."

"THAT SUCKER ROASTED MY BUTT FROM HERE TO NEXT TUESDAY!" yelled Blaze. "I GOT PICTURES TOO!"

Prof. Oak was amused. "Right…"

"DON'T BELIEVE ME? OH, NEXT TIME I SEE YOU, I'LL…"

"It sure looked like it," muttered Ash.

"You must have been mistaken," said Prof. Oak.

A doorbell rang in the background.

"Aah!" said Prof. Oak. "There's my pizza! Coming!" He ran out of the screen. He quickly poked his head back in. "It was very nice talking to you, Ash. And good luck." He disappeared again.

Steam was blowing out of Blaze's ears.

"Mmmm," said Prof. Oak's voice. "Anchovy, spinach and pineapple pizza." The screen turned off.

Blaze gagged. "Anchovies and spinach? Where does that guy get his pizza?"

"Now I've got you!" yelled a voice.

The redhead was panting. She was holding the melted remains of a bike.

Blaze sweatdropped. "Bye." He dashed the other way, but not before Ash grabbed the collar of his jacket.

"I knew I'd find you here!" yelled the girl.

"Hey! What happened to your bike?!" said Ash.

"AAAAARRGH!" Blaze was flailing. "I TOLD YOU THIS WOULD HAPPEN! NOW THIS GIRL'S GONNA RIP MY HEAD OFF BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU IDIOT!"

"What happened to my bike? You happened to my bike, you little loser! And you too, emo idiot!" she yelled, pointing a finger at Blaze.

Blaze swore that he saw red. "ONE! I'M NOT AN EMO IDIOT! DO YOU SEE ANY BLACK NAIL POLISH OR QUARTER CUTS? EARRINGS? DIDN'T THINK SO! TWO! I DID NOT HAPPEN TO YOUR BIKE! LOOK AT THIS!" He turned around.

The girl saw the bike tread mark melted into Blaze's back. It went through his jacket, and his shirt, and ended in a bloody scar that traveled all the way up his spine.

"THAT'S BECAUSE OF THIS IDIOT!" he yelled, pointing at Ash. "HE JUMPED OFF A RIDGE, CRASHED YOUR STUPID BIKE ON TOP OF ME, KNOCKED ME UNCONCIOUS, ZAPPED ME WITH HIS PIKACHU AND SENT ME FLYING! AFTER WHICH, I GOT ROASTED BY A LEGENDARY BIRD, HIT BY A CAR, SMACKED BY A GYARADOS' TWISTER AND HYPER BEAM, WENT THROUGH THE ROOF, THROUGH THE CEILING, THROUGH THE FLOOR, AND LANDED IN THE BASEMENT!" He was pointing to the respective holes. "AND YOU START YELLING AT ME?! I DON'T GIVE A STUPID DOGGONE DA-"

Ash kicked him in the ankle. "No cussing in this fic," he hissed.

Blaze was fuming. "Oh, why, you little-"

"This is what's left after you stole it to save your Pokémon!" screeched the girl.

Ash was sweatdropping.

"Now I can see why your Pokémon is in the-" She began flailing. "Whoa, ohoh aaah!"

CRASH.

She had fallen backwards.

Ash gasped. He ran toward her. She was rubbing her neck.

"Lemme help you!" he said, holding out his hands.

She smacked him away. "I don't need your help! And you're gonna pay for what you did to my bike!"

"YOU TWO ARE SO FULL OF CRAP!" yelled Blaze. "SHUT YOUR STUPID DOGGONE TRAPS, YOU TWO IDIOTS!" He stormed over to a machine across the room.

He began fiddling with it, pressing a few buttons and such. He sent all his Pokémon to Prof. Oak's lab except his Pidgey and his Charmander. He sighed. _Not what I had in mind. _He saw Ash and that girl talking, he saw the nurse walk in with the Chansey and Pikachu, he heard what they were saying, but it never registered. He wasn't even sure where he was anymore.

_Am I going insane? _he thought. _'S not too bad._

Sirens went off, and a voice blared through the building, but he didn't care about that. He saw a balloon above the window in the ceiling, but he didn't give a dang. He saw two PokéBalls containing an Ekans and a Koffing fall through, but he didn't care. He saw the Koffing fill the room with smoke, but he didn't care. He saw two people and a Meowth-

_Hold it. Those are the bad guys from my dream a week ago. _He clenched his fists. _Man, I feel like I'm drunk or something. Ah, well, who cares. Wait… I don't drink. How could I be drunk? Never mind._

He stood up, and almost fell over. _Geez, I'm totally wigged out. _He stumbled over to the two people and talking Meowth. He saw Ash, the girl, and the nurse run away with the stretcher, but he didn't care. He saw the Ekans and Koffing rip through wires, but he didn't care.

The gang of two followed their Pokémon, who followed the girl, Ash, and the nurse. Blaze put away his glasses and put on his sunglasses. He stumbled after the two.

When he caught up to them, they were in a room full of PokéBalls. The evil woman was calling the redhead pretty pathetic. The girl, in turn, got ticked, and sent out a Goldeen. Of course, that worked REALLY well. She returned it, and Ash ran away. Ekans and Koffing followed.

Blaze tapped the purple-haired guy on the shoulder.

"Listen," Blaze slurred. "Give yourselves up quietly."

The two responded by sweatdropping and drawing guns on Blaze.

The girl gasped. "What're you doing, kid?"

"I'm older than you, redhead," said Blaze wearily.

"I can smell that liquor on your breath," said the man. "Underage, aren't you?"

They shot.

Blaze had holes in his sunglasses. "Okay," he said.

He kicked the woman in the leg and brought her down.

"You guys know it's illegal to take Pokémon?" Blaze slurred.

"Come on, Jesse," said the man. "Let's go."

They left.

Blaze swore and staggered after them.

The girl was confused. "Is that guy really drunk?"

As soon as Blaze stumbled outside, the center blew up.

"Now I'm seein' lights," Blaze stuttered. "Geez, someone get a breathalyzer."

**The next morning…**

"WAAAAH!"

"What's the matter?" Misty was clinging to Ash.

"Look! Over there!"

Blaze walked up, only to see Ash striking an 'I'm gonna catch ya' pose over a Caterpie.

"Poor Caterpie," muttered Blaze. "It's amazing that I was acting like a drunk, but I wasn't. At least those stupid bad guys 're gone. What're they called? Team Rocket?" He laughed as he saw Misty, the redhead, cowering in fear.

"Big baby!" he shouted.

Misty ignored him. She was genuinely surprised he wasn't drunk. Of course, the guy wasn't even thirteen yet. He was older than Misty, but only by a year or so.

Ash tossed the PokéBall.

"And, that's the end of this chapter," said Blaze. "Ack, my head…"

**Crap, that was long. It took me FOREVER, so sorry for the delay. This thing was almost 4300 words long! Just this chapter! Anyway, cheers!**


	4. The Flickering Blaze!

**This chapter is dedicated to AceTrainerTe! Thanks for the compliment!**

**I bet you're all wondering how Blaze survived getting shot like that. Well, you'll find out. And what about him acting all drunk? You'll find out about that too; probably not in this chapter, though. Oh, and to center this on Blaze more, it'll be in first person, with Blaze as the narrator. Cheers!**

"Caterpie, you're mine!" Ash shouted.

Caterpie squealed as the PokéBall hit it. The PokéBall sucked the bug up via red light and began rocking back and forth.

Ash was extremely tense.

I turned to Misty. "Don't you hate these tense cliché silences?"

She nodded. "They're number five on my list of things I hate."

"What're the first four?"

"Well, number four is the pair of jerks I just met yesterday."

I frowned. "I've heard better insults from a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Get a life, loser."

Of course, Ash wasn't paying any attention to Misty firing off insults at me, while I just stood there with his arms folded. Yep, calm and cool, that's me.

The ball stopped moving.

Ash twitched.

"Oh no," I muttered. "Here we go."

"Yes! I did it!" yelled Ash, running toward the PokéBall, punching the air. Trumpets were playing.

I looked around wildly. "Since when were trumpeters following us?"

Misty shrugged. "It's probably the author's Vicodin kicking in."

_I heard that, _boomed a voice. **(Cool! Darkblitz booms!)**

Of course, Ash didn't notice. He was doing his first victory pose of millions.

I sweatdropped. "What a weirdo." The music got louder. I covered my ears. "STOP THE MUSIC! IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE!"

"Seems like the music has done its job," muttered Misty.

I smirked. "That one wasn't too bad."

Pikachu sighed. "Pikachu…"

Ash was yelling a bunch of gibberish. He hooked Misty's arm with his and began dancing around.

Pikachu and I sweatdropped.

"Don't you think they'd make a nice couple?" I asked him.

Pikachu rolled his eyes. "Pikapika…"

Ash and Misty were going too fast. Pikachu and I began following them with our eyes. We got so dizzy that we fell over.

Misty pulled away. "Ash, you're acting like a-"

"Jack plus Ash minus H plus S," I muttered.

Pikachu would have nodded in agreement, if it wasn't conked out.

"I love my new little Pokémon," Ash was saying as he rubbed the ball against his cheek.

Misty and I sweatdropped.

"I guess it takes a worm to love a worm," muttered Misty.

"Very funny," said Ash sarcastically.

"I thought so too," I said. "And you know what else I think?" I leaned in close to Misty's ear, so close that my breath made her hair stand on end. "I think it takes one to know one," I said, just loud enough so Ash could hear.

Ash laughed so hard I thought he was gonna die. While he went to go talk to Pikachu, Misty got riled up at me, of course.

"Say that to my face," she said threateningly.

I leaned toward her so that my face was an inch from hers. "That to my face," I taunted.

She smacked her forehead. "Not that!"

I smacked my forehead. "Not that!" I imitated.

"Shut up, idiot!" she yelled.

"Shut up, idiot!" I yelled.

"Oh, you think this is funny, do you?"

"Yes." I had a grin on my face that put Ash's to shame. And that was saying a LOT. Especially since I almost never smiled.

"Caterpie, you're stickin' with us," Ash was saying.

Misty sweatdropped. She turned her head to Ash slowly. "Does that mean…"

Needless to say, Ash sent Caterpie out.

Misty sprinted in the other direction, dragging me behind her. She was practically in the Olympics, she was running so fast. I swear, those bruises on my heels from that dragging are here to this day.

Misty peeked out from behind a tree, thirty yards from Caterpie.

"Big chicken," I muttered. Where the tree didn't shield Misty, I did. "I hope she's paying me for this."

"There's nothin' to be scared of," said Ash. He held his hand out to Caterpie, telling him to climb up on his shoulder.

Caterpie nodded, but then he saw Misty. He charged past Ash and Pikachu, towards Misty and I.

I didn't hear what Ash said. There might have been someone in the Arctic Circle who didn't hear Misty scream. They must have been pretty far underwater, though. I swear that she woke the dead with that screech.

Caterpie was nuzzling Misty's leg.

"Hey Misty, Caterpie really likes you!" said Ash. "Isn't that cute?"

"Get this disgusting bug away from me!" Misty shrieked.

"Please don't… come any closer to me!" she squealed, frantically crab walking backwards toward another tree.

"Misty, you're going to insult it to death," I said. "What did this thing do to you?"

Caterpie looked down sadly. Pikachu patted it on the back.

"I know!" said Misty. She picked Pikachu up. "You be friends with that creepy bug and I'll be friends with Pikachu!"

"Pikachu only likes me," said Ash proudly, "and zaps anybody who tries to – Huh?"

Pikachu and Misty were laughing together.

"See ya, Caterpie," I mumbled. "I'll leave you guys to your problem." I looked down at Caterpie. Its eyes were watering.

Uh-oh.

"It's so gross!" said Misty. "Ash, put that slimy thing back in the PokéBall! Bugs are one of the three most disgusting things in the world!"

"Aside from you, what are the other disgusting things?" Ash asked.

"I asked her first," I muttered.

"Very funny," she said sarcastically. "Carrots, peppers…" She smacked Caterpie flying with a mallet that came out of nowhere. (Mmm, maybe we should have a fencing match, mallet versus frying pan) "And bugs! Everybody has something they don't like and I don't like bugs!"

Ash pulled down his lower eyelids and stuck out his tongue. "Yeah? Well, I like carrots AND peppers AND bugs!"

"I'm in the middle," I muttered. "I only like raw carrots, spicy peppers like jalapenos and habaneros, and I like bug Pokémon." Wow, they really cared.

Ash stretched his arms out wide. "What I don't like is the way you're hurting Caterpie's feelings with your silly fear of bugs!"

"Hm!" Misty turned away.

Ash invited Caterpie to climb up on his shoulder. "You won't scare Misty anymore," he said.

"Whaddaya mean he won't scare me?" Misty asked.

"Because I'm gonna slit your throat," I muttered.

"Shut up!" she said loudly.

"We'll go on without her," said Ash. He walked away, and Pikachu followed.

"Nice going, idiot," I snarled. "Way to go. You deserve a medal."

She ignored me and stood up. "Oh yeah? I'll show you!" She waited until Ash was far ahead, and then followed him.

I sighed. "Charmander, Pidgey, you might as well come out."

They did.

"What's the matter, man?" asked Charmander. "Meowth got your tongue?"

"Well, I – Wait." Did he just TALK? "Did you just talk?"

"Well, something came out of my mouth and – Wait. You can understand me?"

"Obviously," I said dully.

"Whoa, this is heavy," said Pidgey.

I held my head. "Not you too."

"This is cool," said Charmander. "I can talk to Blaze!"

Pidgey began glowing. "Rock 'n' roll!" he shouted.

I blinked. "Pidgey's evolving?"

Only problem was, instead of glowing pure white, they were glowing pitch black.

If that surprised me, what would happen next rocked my world.

Pidgeotto was black. "Gah! I'm emo!" he shrieked. He had black feathers, but the undersides of his wings were dark blue. The feathers on its head that were supposed to be pink were dark red.

"Am I dreaming?" I wondered aloud.

"Let's see," said Charmander. He roasted me with a Flamethrower.

I coughed black smoke. "Guess not. Let's go find Misty and Ash."

I saw Misty dive behind a tree.

"What are you following us for?" yelled Ash.

She sweatdropped. "My… my bike! I'm holding you responsible for my bike!"

"When are you gonna get over that dumb old bike?"

"For your information, Mister Pokémon Master, you're the dumb one, because if you hadn't destroyed it in the first place, I could've ridden out of here by now!"

"I told you I'd make good on your bike one day, and if I'm so dumb, how come you're still following me?"

"SHUT UP!" I screeched. "YOU TWO PSYCHOTIC FREAKS NEVER STOP ARGUING! FYI, I'M GETTING REALLY DARN ANNOYED WITH YOU TWO IDIOTS YELLING! SO SHUT YOUR STUPID DOGGONE TRAPS!" Wow, that was kind of a bold statement.

Amazingly, they didn't even pay attention. That was probably the longest speech I ever made. And it was a waste. I'd never forget this.

"I'm not following you; this happens to be the fastest way through the woods!" said Misty.

"Fine. Do whatever you want," said Ash, walking away.

"That's exactly what I'm doing!" she yelled.

Pikachu looked between them and sighed.

I smacked Misty upside the head. "Don't you know that dumb means lack of speech? Clearly, you're not dumb."

"Shut up."

…

I absentmindedly poked the campfire with a long stick. If you need any help with fire, picking locks, making bombs, creating oil slicks, making explosions, any of that stuff, I'm your man. That stuff never ceases to amaze me.

It was amazing how warm the night was. I had taken my shirt off and put it in my sleeping bag, so it'd be warm for tomorrow.

Ash and Misty were already asleep, or so it seemed to be. Pikachu and Caterpie were talking about something. I was alone. I still hadn't shown anybody Pidgeotto. They'd probably think the Pokémon was spawn of Satan.

I saw the moon glint in Caterpie's eyes. I'm no translator, but it looked like Caterpie was talking to Pikachu about becoming a Butterfree someday.

I saw Caterpie's face fall when he looked at Misty. Pikachu began comforting it.

"Hey, Caterpie," I said. "Misty may be a bug-hating self-centered egotistical psychotic freaky jerk, but I'm not. Anytime you wanna talk to or vent on someone, let me know, okay?"

Caterpie giggled and nodded. The two Pokémon and I gazed at the full moon.

The sun soon replaced the moon. The fire had burned out, and everybody was asleep.

I noticed Caterpie sleeping right next to Misty's face.

I swore under my breath and cautiously approached Misty.

I saw her eyes slowly open.

"Mist, whatever you do," I whispered, "don't-"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Pikachu and Ash jumped about three feet in the air.

Ash jerked his head around madly. "Wha, wha, what's going on? What's happening? Wha?" The idiot looked like he just woke up during Vietnamese guerilla machine gun fire back in the '60s.

"Scream," I finished.

Well, Misty squealed and got all ticked off at Caterpie. Caterpie went in its PokéBall sadly, Ash fired off insults, and I just put my face in my hands. I cleaned up camp, and had just put my shirt and jacket back on and stuffed my sleeping bag in its sack when Ash spotted a Pidgeotto. Well, you know how that goes.

Ash tossed a PokéBall, just to have it slapped away by a wing.

"Idiot!" I said loudly.

Ash was so STUPID. First he just throws a PokéBall on a whim, and then he sent out Caterpie, and actually thought it was a good idea. Hmmm. Bird. Versus. Worm. Gee, I wonder who wins. Idiot! Apparently, the same thoughts were running through Misty's mind, because she scolded Ash almost as much as I yelled at him. I was half expecting his eardrums to rupture.

Well, he ended up catching it with the help of Pikachu's Thundershock, and began bragging about it like it was a million bucks. Man, he'd commit suicide if someone killed his stupidity. What a freak.

"I am the greatest," he said to Misty.

I snuck up behind Ash, made the thumb and forefinger of my right hand into an L, put it on my forehead, and began dancing around and making Ash look really stupid.

"You're the worst," she said. "You have no idea what you're doing. It'll be a long time 'til you're a Pokémon master, like a million years!"

"Amen, sistah," I said, saluting her. I then continued to do my loser dance.

He sighed. "I'm trying to."

"You should try to learn something about Pokémon first. With Pokémon you've got to use strategy."

I put on a wig and sunglasses that came out of nowhere, like it always happens in the cartoon. "Ashy, my man," I said in Ziggy Marley's voice, "you should listen to her. Let it flow into your brain instead of in one ear and out the other. You are a LOSAH!"

I could tell that Misty was getting ready to die.

"Pidgeotto is a bird. Caterpie is a worm. Birds eat worms, mister Pokémon Master!"

"And the Mister has spoken!" I said in Ziggy's voice. (Get it? The Mister? Misty? The Mister? Never mind…)

"Well, if you just try hard enough, things'll work out, won't they?" Ash was getting desperate.

"No, Ash, I'm afraid things WON'T just work out if you try hard enough!" She began stepping toward him menacingly. He began stepping back. And me, well, I was still Ziggy doing the loser dance. "The Pokémon Trainer's judgment is more important than anything else, and unfortunately for you, the Trainer has to have a BRAIN!"

"Ash, you just got told by a redhead girl. How sad can you get?" I mocked, still Ziggy.

Misty couldn't take it anymore and fell to the ground laughing. Ash smacked me upside the head. Obviously, he doesn't appreciate Ziggy.

I heard a girlish and totally lame cackle, and then a "So, we meet again."

"I know that voice," said Ash.

"I know that aura of idiocy and stupidity," I said, finally losing my Ziggyness.

"To protect the world from devastation!"

"To unite all peoples within our nation!"

"Cool!" I said. "They're antiracist! They unite all people! Unfortunately, they suck." Of course, my voice was dripping with sarcasm.

Well, you know how the rest of the motto goes.

"No, not this again," said Ash.

Yeah, and then all that speed of light and prepare to fight and that's right crap. Get a life.

Ash put his hands behind his head. "Uh, we're kinda busy now, so if you could-"

I covered my face with my hands. "Idiot!"

"Quiet, little boy," said Jessie. "We're not here to listen to you, we're here to get your Pokémon!"

"Hand over that Pikachu," said James.

"Fat chance, freaks," I said dully. "We're not here to listen to a running gag."

"It's the drinker!" screeched Meowth.

"I don't drink," I said coldly.

"Smell that liquor on his breath," said Jessie disgustedly.

"When I break your noses, you'll never smell again, kapeesh?" (I think that's how you spell it…)

"So, you're admitting it, huh?" said Meowth.

"I don't know what it is," I said truthfully. "And, nice fake handguns. You gave us a scare back in Viridian."

"How'd you know?" said James in disbelief.

"I probably wouldn't live through getting shot in the face," I said coolly.

Well, you know how the rest of it goes. And if you don't, watch the TV show.

They sent out their Pokémon.

"Hey!" said Ash. "Two against one, that's cheating!"

"Well, as we say," said Jessie, "all's fair in love, war and Pokémon battles."

"Tell that to the hippies," I said menacingly. "That'd be a nice life goal."

"I'd say that saying's rotten, and so are you!" said Ash.

"Some people just don't appreciate love and war," I muttered to the Mister.

"Can't argue with you there," she agreed.

The funniest part was when Pidgeotto lost and Ash tried to beat the bad guys off.

James kept him at bay with one hand.

Ash began flailing. "All right, let's go! Put 'em up!"

"Heh, what a fool," said Meowth. "In Pokémon battles, only the Pokémon can fight each other."

"Well, as we say, all's fair in love, war, and Pokémon battles," I said coolly in perfect imitation of Jessie's voice.

The Mister just laughed.

"Buzz off," said James. He flicked Ash in the forehead.

Ash rolled backwards. "Ow, oh ooh, aw, ow." It was really funny the way he got knocked by one flick. He had swirls in his eyes.

Of course, they lost and ran away.

"Come back anytime!" yelled Misty. "We'll be glad to beat you!" She stuck out her tongue.

"You didn't even do anything," I pointed out.

"Neither did you," she retorted.

"I never said I did. But you said you did."

"Gah! Shut up!"

Ash was congratulating Caterpie on how well it did.

"You're stronger than you look, Caterpie," said Misty.

"Pika," said Pikachu.

"Well, Misty, I guess you feel different about Caterpie now," he said.

"Well, I-" she began.

I sighed and began walking away. Off to Pewter City I go. I'll leave them to make up.

I heard Misty scream and Caterpie evolve into Metapod. I kept going.

_Halfway to being a Butterfree,_ I thought. _Way to go!_

I heard a Beedrill buzz, and a shriek from Misty. Soon, Ash and Misty were running after me.

That's life for the flickering Blaze.

**That was pretty good. I think I'll keep it in first person. Cheers! Review!**


	5. Samurais and Bugs Don't Mix

**Hello, computer users! This is your humble and loyal author here, for yet another chapter of this fanfic. Technically, in the TV show, we're at the fourth episode. Hopefully, things'll go much faster according to the plot line I have in mind. And, I warn you, it's a doozy! I'll give you a hint: a certain glitch has a special place in this story. Trust me when I say it'll reveal itself soon enough. Hey, Misty, care to do the disclaimer? I haven't been very good about that lately.**

**Misty: Sure! F. E. M. Darkblitz does not own Pokémon, because if he did, Blaze would be as famous as me. Sorry, Blaze, but I guess you're just not cut out for fame.**

**Blaze: Yeah, how do you stand it?**

**Misty: Huh?**

**Anyway, cheers!**

**Oh, and I changed the genres from Adventure/Romance to Mystery/Horror, 'cause it just seemed right. And this chapter's for pikachuhunter1, because she's the only one that reviewed the last chapter.**

I slipped and fell flat on my face. That hurt. I felt blood run down my face.

"Blaze, you're way too clumsy," said Ash.

"I tripped on a root, Mr. Astute Observer," I snarled.

I felt a certain air of silence. Uh-oh.

Three, two, one…

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The Mister was hanging from a branch with her arms and legs.

"What's wrong now?" asked Ash tiredly.

"I think we all know," I muttered.

"I think I see another bug!" screeched Misty. "Gross!"

"This is a forest," I said in frustration. "Forests are always crawling with bugs, Misty."

Oh, a note: I caught a Caterpie and a Pikachu earlier. I had gotten lots of PokéBalls at the Viridian PokéMart.

"Maybe it's a-" Ash, Pikachu and I all sighed.

"Cowderpie!" Ash finished.

Pikachu and I fell anime-style, and Misty's branch broke. She fell just like us.

Ash laughed nervously, scratching his neck.

"That's not funny!" said Misty. "You know I hate bugs and I saw one right over there!" She pointed.

A Weedle crawled up to them, as if to prove Misty's point.

The Mister dove behind Ash. I sighed.

"Maybe you should spray some bug spray on your legs, Misty," I said coolly. "That way, when the Weedle crawls up, it won't bite your candy butt!"

"This behind's all muscle," said Misty hotly.

"A Weedle!" exclaimed Ash. He pulled Dexter out of his short-sleeved jacket pocket.

"Weedle," said the Pokédex. "The stinger on this Pokémon guarantees that any attacker will get the point right where it hurts."

I mentally chuckled at Ash's Dexter's little joke. "In other words, your happy place," I said.

Ash winced. "Ouch." He furrowed his eyebrows. "A stinger, huh? Now there's a challenge…"

"Weedle and Caterpie are the two bug Pokémon of the Viridian Forest," I said matter-of-factly. "Their main difference is that Weedle has poison, but Caterpie doesn't." Yes, I'm the brains of the group. Hey, someone has to be. And seeing as Ash is lacking in the brains category, and Misty, well, is a freak, that leaves me.

"Why are you so excited about a bug with a stinger?" shrieked Misty. "Make it go awayeee!" Okay, that was creepy…

"You've gotta be kidding," said Ash. "You can't possibly expect a great Pokémon Trainer like me to let a Weedle escape. I'm gonna catch it." He reached for his belt. "Oh… Oh yeah, I almost forgot," he said, holding up a finger. "You have to weaken a Pokémon before you can capture it." He turned his head. "Let's go, Pikachu."

Pikachu rolled over in its blanket. It was resting its head on a pillow.

Ash, the Mister and I all almost fell over; we were precariously balancing on one foot each.

Ash scratched his jaw. "Taking a nap, huh?" He pulled out two PokéBalls. "Okay, snooze you lose. There's still Pidgeotto and Metapod to do the job, and they give me the respect I deserve."

The Mister's arms were folded. "You deserve to have your head examined."

I pulled on my Ziggy costume. "I second that, man!" I said in that weird voice.

Misty looked down to see Weedle on her leg.

Everything turned dark.

"Uh-oh," I said in Ziggy's voice. "Duck and cover, man!"

Misty screamed bloody murder. You think you know bloody murder? Trust me, you do NOT know bloody murder.

She ran away, leaving the Weedle rolling.

"Don't just stand there, catch it!" she shrieked.

"Have no fear, Ash is here!" He sent out Pidgeotto.

I began running in the Mister's direction. I wasn't gonna watch this freak show.

However, she had taken a turn, and I didn't see it, so now I was alone again. Crap.

I heard the unsheathing of a sword.

Somebody jumped out of the bushes. "HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" His sword was about to crack my skull open.

I blocked with the frying pan. "WHAT THE HECK!" I exclaimed. "Is this how you greet everyone you meet?"

We began a fencing match. Hard-core, man.

"Are you a Pokémon Trainer who comes from Pallet?" he asked, once the five-minute match was over.

"Sorta…"

"What do you mean?"

"Well," I began, "I don't know where I come from. I started my journey in Pallet, though."

"Then let's have a Pokémon match," he said.

Okay… "All right. How about, a, two on two?"

"Works for me," said the samurai.

We stood on opposite sides of a clearing.

He sent out his Pokémon first. A Pinsir. Okay, I can work with that.

I sent out Charmander. Fire vs. bug. Works for me.

"You have the honor," I said.

"Pinsir, tackle it!" said the samurai.

"Flamethrower," I said quietly.

Pinsir was roasted in one hit.

Charmander began dancing. "Yes! I beat Pinsir!" he said.

The samurai gaped. "It can talk?"

I shrugged. "I don't know how, but it can."

He sent out his Metapod. Well, that's a toughie.

I told Charmander to use Ember. Metapod was chrysalis toast.

Charmander began glowing black. I like to call it negative evolving.

He turned into a black Charmeleon. Everything except his eyes and tail flame were black.

"Holy jeez, I look like a demon!" said Charmeleon.

The samurai blinked. "Whoa."

"I know," I said. "That's what happened to my Pidgey, too. Now I've got a black Pidgeotto."

Well, he was gone. I'd only known him for ten minutes. Talk about a strange acquaintance.

Misty bumped right into me.

"Ouch!" She fell backwards.

I turned around. "What?"

She smiled sheepishly. "Sorry."

…

I ignored Misty's ranting about bugs and took my time to appreciate the forest. It had a certain timeless feel about it

I heard the unsheathing of a sword. Oh, good.

"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

The blade was a centimeter from Misty's nose. Unfortunately, I wasn't so lucky. I had a deep cut on my right arm. And it hurt like h-e-double toothpicks.

I gasped. "Not you again!"

"Greetings, o shrieking maiden," he said. "Are you by chance the Pokémon Trainer who comes from Pallet?"

Misty shook her head quickly. "No, that's not me!"

"Alas." He sheathed his now slightly bloodstained sword. "My search continues." He turned away. "I advise you to refrain from further shrieking while passing through this forest, unless your goal is to attract a horde of Beedrills."

He walked away.

Misty sat down. "What a weird kid. I wonder why he'd be looking for a Pokémon Trainer from… Ah! That's Ash!"

"Very good," I groaned. "Don't mind me, just a preteen with a big flesh wound, hoo hoo."

Of course, she ran off.

I sighed. "Oh, good."

A Weedle crawled up to me. "Weed," it said.

"What?" I said. "Do you want to come with me or something?"

It nodded. I tapped a PokéBall on its head, and it only took a few seconds for it to stop vibrating.

"Cool," I said to myself. "I got a Weedle."

I weakly stood up. "I gotta get back to Ash and the Mister," I said to myself.

By the time I got back, Ash had just tossed a PokéBall at Weedle, unsuccessfully.

He smacked his forehead and returned Pidgeotto.

"That Weedle only got away because you mixed me up," accused Ash.

"Don't blame your failure on me," said Samurai. "Your Pokémon handling is dimwitted and clumsy."

"We'll blame the sword, then," I said madly. Seriously, that anime anger sign was all over my head. "You may be right about his handling, but you saw that he was in the middle of something. Don't draw your sword on him when he's busy. Look what you did, rat!" I held out my badly cut arm. "You did that when you jumped out at Misty here. Look at your sword. It's got blood on it!"

Amazingly, everybody ignored me AGAIN.

"Whaddoyou know about Pokémon?" said Ash. "I bet I could beat you in a Pokémon match blindfolded."

"There is one way to find out," said Samurai.

Ash sent out Pidgeotto, only the thing was sleeping.

"Gee, that could be a problem," I said icily.

So, Pinsir wasn't even fazed by Pidgeotto's Sand-Attack, and tackled Pidgeotto. It was knocked out in one hit. And then, Ash sent out Metapod. Pinsir tried to chop it in half, but Metapod used Harden and oh why do I bother.

It got to the point where the match was Metapod vs. Metapod. This could take a while, if not the rest of our lives.

Misty, Pikachu and I were in sunglasses and bathing suits sipping those drinks with the little umbrellas in them, lounging on lawn chairs. Hey, it was taking all day. We might as well relax.

I had bandaged my arm and wrapped it and the works and all that, so I was trying to take it easy. Thank the stars for first aid kits. I'm never traveling without them.

…

Jeezum, we'd been there all day. Well, Pikachu, the Mister and I had finished packing up our lounging things (I carried it all, but, I don't mind; it strengthens the muscles), and Ash and Samurai hadn't done a dang thing.

Pikachu, Misty and I had our arms folded and eyes closed.

"We could be stuck in this forest for the rest of our lives," said Misty. "Boys can be so stubborn."

I raised an eyebrow. "Well, aren't you the expert. I hope you didn't mean ALL boys. Unless, of course, you've done some studying of the subject."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I smirked. "Oh, nothing. Nothing at all."

The two airheads fell over like toppled statues.

"Don't, give, up…" said Ash stupidly. He blinked.

"You two are more hardheaded than your Metapods!" yelled Misty.

I heard a buzzing noise in the distance. Oh, crap.

"What's that noise?" asked the Mister.

Samurai stood up. "A Beedrill swarm approaches! Our match must end!" He held out a PokéBall! "Metapod, return!"

The swarm appeared above the trees. Oh, double crap.

They flew right toward us. Crap cubed.

Of course, Ash had to pull out his Dexter. We could have spent those precious seconds running away. Of course, that's what I did.

"The Weedle that got away from you has informed the rest of its kind!" I heard Samurai say. "Good day!" He was soon hot on my tail.

A Beedrill flew over my head, holding a Metapod. Oh, good.

Misty and Ash were soon right behind Samurai. Of course, being the extremely fast and tall person I am, I was way ahead of them. Lucky for me.

I saw a bush and dove into it. A few seconds later, Samurai, Ash, the Mister, and Pikachu all jumped on top of me. Bingo! That hurt.

They all sighed with relief.

I managed to heave Samurai off of me with my good arm. Jeez, that's one heavy guy.

Then I noticed we were right in front of a whole hive of Kakuna. Oh. That's bad.

"A whole hive of Kakunas," whispered Samurai.

Misty gasped.

"Kakuna," said Ash's Dexter. "A transitional stage between Weedle and Beedrill. Kakunas remain inactive until they evolve into deadly Beedrills and hatch."

I noticed Ash's Metapod at the bottom of the tree where the Kakuna lived.

"Hey! Over there!" exclaimed Ash. "It's Metapod!"

Misty and I covered his mouth. "Keep your voice down!" we whispered together.

I saw a Kakuna's eye glint.

Glowing cracks appeared in their backs. They hatched. This sounds like fun.

"Beedrills!" said Misty. "They've evolved!"

The Beedrill formed a huge swarm.

"I've got a plan," I whispered. "Dance around like the idiots you are, and I'll run like crazy!"

I jumped out of there and sprinted before Misty could say, "I don't like you." And believe me, Misty could say that FAST. Especially if she were saying it to me.

Needless to say, they were hot on my tail.

After a while of running, I saw a cabin come into view.

"My cabin!" yelled Samurai. "I think we can make it!"

I dove for the door. When everybody was inside, I slammed the door shut. Some Beedrill stingers broke through the door, and pulled themselves out.

"Whew," gasped Ash. "That was close."

"Thank you, that's very helpful," I said sarcastically.

Samurai put his costume on a table. "I hope you've learned your lesson, novice. Your letting that Weedle escape almost cost our lives."

"Take back that novice crap," said Ash. **(In the English dub, he really says crack instead of crap, but I changed it.)**

"I do take it back," said Samurai, "because not even a novice would abandon his own Pokémon as you did."

"I tried to save Metapod…" said Ash quietly.

"Chu?" Pikachu whispered. I picked him up and put him on my shoulder.

"Your Metapod will pay for its trainer's inexperience. The other trainers from Pallet would never have been so irresponsible."

"Other trainers from Pallet?" Ash said slowly. "Have you fought matches against Gary and the others?"

"Hello, I'm right here," I murmured. Pikachu patted my head to comfort me.

"Ah, there were three spectacular matches," answered Samurai. "Each more challenging than the last. Those trainers really knew how to raise Pokémon."

"Dang right," I murmured proudly.

"Even though I was defeated all three times," he continued, "I was inspired to redouble my own training. I have been eagerly preparing for that day when finally I would beat the next Pokémon Trainer from Pallet."

"Hold up," said Misty. "Did you battle Blaze?"

"Sure did," I said. "I beat each Pokémon in one shot."

"So that's why you've been waiting for Ash to show up!" said Misty.

"Compared to those other three, Novice here is a joke," said Samurai.

"I'm right here," I said angrily. Way to notice me, nimrod.

Ash growled and clenched his teeth. You know what's interesting? Ash is really good at saying swear words in Japan, but here in lil' ol' America, he's Mr. Cleanmouth. Just a bit of trivia for you.

"I'm sick and tired of all this bull crap, Samurai," I said quietly through my teeth. "You're the one who distracted Ash, and you didn't think it was a big deal, until a huge Beedrill swarm comes out of nowhere and steals his Metapod, and now you're giving him a bunch of crap that he doesn't deserve. He didn't abandon Metapod. You saw that Beedrill take it. Man, just shut up."

Why do I get the feeling that nobody ever listens to me?

That night, I sat outside thinking. Why do I always end up ignored? Is it because I'm not as great or funny or hopelessly romantic as they are? They hate me. And all of you. Yes, you, sitting there with your eyes glued to the computer. I'm sure you hate me too. (I'm lookin' at you, Ryan Paralyze.) Honestly, if you've been reading this since Chapter One first came out, you deserve cookies. Go find xxxKinaMariexxx, because I don't have any.

Before I knew it, it was morning. I saw Ash go off somewhere, to find Metapod, no doubt.

Misty, Samurai and Pikachu soon followed in a net, to protect themselves from the Beedrill, no doubt.

Suddenly, a swarm of Beedrill came right at me. They began stabbing at me, creating new wounds and opening old ones. I felt a white-hot fire erupt in my arm, and it slowly spread throughout my body. Crap. I've been poisoned. Eventually, everything began fading out. The last thing I saw was a worried-looking Butterfree floating over my head.

**Hm, a cliffie, eh? Well, you'll just have to review to find out what happens.**

**Ash: What happens?**

**I just said, review.**

**Ash: I can't. I'm only a fictional character.**

**Well then, you've got yourself a problem.**


	6. Blaze May Dream

**Hello again, everybody! Honestly, I'm rather saddened by how many reviews I have. Do you really hate me that much?**

**Misty: Yes, they do. We all do.**

**Gee, thanks for the uplifting statement. Well, let's get on with it.**

I found myself walking through a dense and foggy forest. It almost felt like a jungle in my opinion. I kept half expecting a Sceptile to jump out of nowhere and slice me clean in half.

I pushed some branches aside and saw a large boulder covered in soft green moss. I sensed an interesting aura around it, and I came closer.

I gazed at the rock. It somehow felt… good, looking at it.

I cautiously reached out and felt the moss. It was pleasantly cool.

At the touch of my hand, light blue rings rippled across the rock. Okay, that was unusual.

The moss slowly turned into hard ice underneath my fingers. A hard and freezing wind howled around me. I took a good look at my surroundings. I wasn't in that forest anymore, that was for sure. I was in the middle of a blizzard. My skin instantly began turning red from the cold, but I blocked the pain signals.

I took another look at the rock. It was encrusted in beautiful ice crystals. It triggered a memory in my mind.

I felt a sharp pain in my fingers. To my horror, the tips were a dark blue.

Someone yelled my name.

I turned to see that girl from my dreams. You know, back when I was at Ash's house. The one who was attacked by Team Rocket. The one with the chestnut brown hair. Only this time, she was wearing a thick coat and knee-high boots. I, on the other hand, was wearing my jacket and a pair of black sweatpants, along with my running shoes. Hardly snow gear.

I soon came to the horrific truth that I was dying of cold. Oh, good.

The girl ran up to me. I dimly realized that I had collapsed.

A Glaceon leapt onto my stomach and began licking my face worriedly. Well, it's nice to know that somebody cared.

The girl was in tears. "Blaze, you've gotta stay with us! Don't go! Please! We need you!"

I merely shook my head. "Believe me when I say I'm trying as hard as I can, but it's a heck of a lot harder than it looks."

"Please," she pleaded. "You've gotta stay! Please, Blaze, please! Don't leave us like this!"

"Then how should I leave you?" I said sarcastically. "I'm open for suggestions."

"I'd prefer not at all," she said quietly. For some reason, she began edging closer to me. Her face was nearing mine. And for some even stranger reason, I began leaning in too.

Movies flashed behind my eyes, directly into my retinas.

The brown-haired girl on a Pokémon thousands of feet above the ground, battling another Pokémon.

Her Pokémon's wings freezing.

The two of them falling.

She was leaning closer to my face.

Me catching them on a black Charizard.

Us beating the Pokémon.

The Pokémon falling to its doom.

She closed her eyes.

Mewtwo and Mew charging up psychic attacks.

Articuno, Zapdos, Moltres, and Lugia sending beams of energy at Ash, the girl and I.

I closed mine.

Legendary Pokémon preparing their attacks to send that girl and I to kingdom come.

Entei.

Unown.

Celebi.

Suicune.

Latias.

Jirachi.

Groudon.

Deoxys.

Closer…

Rayquaza.

Lucario.

Regirock.

Regice.

Registeel.

Kyogre.

Manaphy.

Dialga.

Palkia.

Closer…

Giratina.

Regigigas.

Shaymin.

Heatran.

Cresselia.

Darkrai.

Suicune.

Phione.

Arceus.

Closer…

Everything was inches away…

I could feel her warm, sweet-smelling breath on my face…

BAM!

Each attack got its own split second freeze frame of it hitting me, followed by me digging endless holes in a desert.

Sinking into the depths of the sea.

Sinking again, only in icy water.

Falling into cyberspace.

Knocked flying by shock waves capable of destroying cities.

Being pushed off a cliff.

Crying over a gravestone whose words I couldn't really see. I'll work on that later.

Punched in the face by some guy in a Cacturne costume. Why did he look so familiar?

Keeling over the girl's hospital bed.

A bullet grazing my left shoulder.

Enveloped by an explosion.

Enveloped by an explosion.

Enveloped by an explosion.

About a hundred more explosions.

She made contact.

Suddenly, everything was gone except the girl and the Glaceon.

She pulled away. "What… happened?"

I was extremely dizzy from seeing so many things so fast, but it looked like… we were in the middle of a cloud or something. Everything was shrouded in fog. You could barely see ten feet in front of you.

I came across a ball of energy. It was pulsating with dark aura. The thing was completely black.

I touched it.

It formed itself into words.

**HELLO, BLAZE. HOW ARE YOU?**

"Gee, I don't know," I said sarcastically.

**I HAVE SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU.**

I felt the girl cling to my jacket. Glaceon growled.

The words turned into a large black rectangle. A blurry picture took shape, and soon, it turned into a movie.

I saw a black shadow on the screen, totally rocking out on guitar. It wouldn't have surprised me if I was looking at Eddie Van Halen.

**BLAZE, DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS?**

"Uh, no."

**THEN IT'LL PROBABLY BE A WHILE UNTIL YOU FIND OUT. BUT YOU'LL FIND OUT WHO IT IS. TRUST ME.**

"Why should I care about this, O Black Flaming Words?" I asked.

**BECAUSE IT WILL EXPLAIN WHERE YOU CAME FROM. YOUR DESTINY, WHERE YOU WILL GO, WHAT YOU WILL DO. IT INVOLVES THIS GIRL AS WELL.**

**"**Really?" asked the girl. "But, what do we have to do?"

**PATIENCE, MY YOUNG FRIEND. FIRST, BLAZE HERE MUST FIND THE DESTINED MEMBERS OF HIS GROUP.**

"You mean, besides Ash and Misty?" I asked, nonplussed.

**YES. IN TIME, BLAZE. IN TIME.**

The world around Glaceon, the girl and I began swirling into a foggy purple vortex.

The girl grabbed my hand. "Bye," she said.

"See ya," I replied.

Glaceon licked my face.

And then, blackness.

…

I sat up and gasped. I was covered in cold sweat. Not to mention, I wasn't wearing a shirt again. Or my pants. Oh, good.

"Where are my pants?" I said aloud.

Of course, nobody answered.

…

Many miles away, in Petalburg City of the Hoenn region, young May Maple sat up and gasped. She was covered in cold sweat.

"Blaze?" she whispered into the darkness.

The young preteen that she had met in dream world did not answer. Or, so she thought.

**Gotcha! Yep, the mystery girl is indeed the young Miss Maple of Petalburg City. And the kiss didn't really mean anything, by the way. Besides, it was only a dream, right?**

**Blaze: Gee, I dunno… seemed pretty real to me.**

**Are you saying that you like May or something? Okay, that's a problem. I don't want to lose my Advanceshipper and Contestshipper readers. (and all other shippers involving May)**

**Blaze: I never said that. I just said… oh, never mind.**

**Blaze's Charmeleon and Pidgeotto: Review!**

**(Oh, and sorry this was shorter than the rest of the chapters so far. Couldn't help it. That's the way it turned out. You know what? I actually come up with a bit of this stuff from content of the nightmares I have every night. Take last night for instance. I had a dream that Dawn and Brock were in Snowpoint City, looking up, and, thousands of feet above them, May was on top of a big Mantyke battling another Pokémon. (I know Mantyke can't really fly, but this is dream land.) The Mantyke's flippers/wings froze, and they fell. That's where I got a small bit of the stuff in this chapter. Interesting stuff, huh? Most of this is just pure genius and awesome storytelling, though. ;D)**


	7. Dark Fire, Two Twins

**I don't think the last chapter made any sense.**

**Blaze: Yeah, like that time you made the oil slick and made that huge crash. Made no sense at all.**

**Uh, what?**

**Blaze: You know… you do know, don't you?**

**What?**

**Blaze: Do you remember when you made that oil slick and that bomb?**

**Um, sorta… I remember seeing the bomb blow up and then, well, I'm not sure…**

**Blaze: Well, I'm sure your faithful readers remember that notice that May Maple hosted a while back.**

**I – she did? Oh no… that's not good…**

**Blaze: Why?**

**(screeching of tires, explosion, May yelling)**

**You didn't happen to catch it on tape, did you?**

**Blaze: Uh, yeah, actually, I did…**

**And May stole it and tried to do it herself… Oh, jeez…**

**May: (walks in) I don't see the problem.**

**May, how come you didn't get hurt at all?**

**May: Turns out it doesn't hurt me because I'm an anime character! (strikes an arrogant pose)**

**(sweatdrops) Oh, and pikachuhunter1, thanks for showing concern! Means a lot to me! But it wasn't serious, anyway… after all, it was mostly the Vicodin I took afterwards that caused problems… (kidding… just took a break XD)**

**Blaze: Why do I get the feeling that none of this ever happened?**

**Good question. Now let's move on already.**

I wiped the sweat from my forehead. First and foremost in my mind was: What the heck was that all about?

I still had no idea who the girl was at all. I dismissed the thought and sighed.

"Are you alright?" asked a voice.

I stretched. "I think so," I replied. "Who's talking, anyway?"

"My name's Shade," said the voice. "Who are you?"

**(A little explanation may be needed here. Shade is the creation of one Ender Zero Missingno (oh, if only you knew), whom I am now co-authoring this story with, along with rubyminuszero. Big news, I know, but they're acquaintances of mine, and I know they'll make this story a whole lot better.)**

"Blaze," I said. "I can't see you. Where are you?"

"Right next to you," said Shade. "You were banged up pretty badly back there. Those Beedrill really got you bad."

I cracked my neck. "Yeah. What happened?"

"Well, Ash's Butterfree found you right when you blacked out."

"How do you know him?"

"What do you think? Anyway, Ash and Misty are probably already in Pewter City by now."

"You mean they left me?"

"Something like that. You were poisoned really badly, but for some strange reason, the poison… evaporated or something."

"I've heard stranger."

"Ah, well. Want your pants back?"

"I'd like them, yes."

Well, turns out that Shade was almost exactly like me. He even dressed like me. Except for… he wore green instead of red. He even had green streaks in his hair. Well, isn't that special.

We ended up traveling together to Pewter City.

Once we got there, I sat down on a big boulder on a ledge. A ladder provided the way down, but the ladder was covered in rocks with price tags.

I blinked. "Huh? It looks like we're in an outdoor gift shop that sells nothing but rocks."

"Sure seems like it," said Shade.

Once we got into town, we decided to leave our Pokémon at the Pokémon Center and break for lunch.

Of course, the restaurant we chose just HAD to be the same one Ash and Misty chose.

"Ooh, that Flint," Ash was saying. "Trying to make a fool outta me."

"He didn't have to do much," I muttered, waving the waiter over for a refill of my orange soda. "Who's Flint, anyway?"

"Did you see those rocks on the ledge back there?" Misty asked.

Shade nodded.

"Flint sells those as Pewter City souvenirs," she explained.

I took a bite of my chicken and quickly gulped down some soda. "Geez, that's spicy," I gasped. "Wow!"

Shade did the same. "No kidding. It's great." He shoved the entire bowl's worth of sweet-and-sour-drenched sticky white rice into his mouth and swallowed. Boy, did we love that stuff. I copied him.

"Do you really think you can win?" Misty asked Ash. "Gym leaders are different from your everyday Pokémon Trainer. They're much, much tougher."

Ash paused, the bowl of rice in his face. He knew how to eat.

"I'll tell you what, Ash," said Misty in a singsong voice. "If you ask me really nicely, I'll help you out."

"I don't need any help," he said through his rice.

That ticked her off. She stood up. "Is that so? Fine with me! There's no way you'll beat Brock in the Pewter City gym! Huh!" She stormed off.

"Ackassjay," I muttered, following Misty.

"Geez," said Shade, following me.

Fortunately, yet amazingly, Ash had no idea how to understand pig Latin. I smirked, knowing that Misty's order had cost 5.50, Ash's had cost 6, Shade cost 5, and I cost 4.50. And now Ash was left with a bill that ordered him to pay 20. It was actually pretty cheap.

"Hey, you can't leave me with the bill!" yelled Ash. "Come back here!"

Misty went to go explore the city, so Shade and I found ourselves back at the Pokémon Center.

"Blaze?" said Nurse Joy worriedly. "What's wrong with your Pokémon?"

I blinked. "What?" Then I remembered my Charmeleon and Pidgeotto's color problem.

"No idea," I admitted. "They evolved, but they glowed black instead of white, and now, well, I don't know."

"Well, they, along with your Caterpie, Pikachu and Weedle are all in perfect health. I suggest you sent one of your… unusual Pokémon to Prof. Oak. He may be able to shed some light on it."

"Sure." I walked over to the transportation machine next to the computers and sent Pidgeotto to Prof. Oak. I decided to send everyone else except Charmeleon as well.

Shade stretched. "What was that all about?"

I explained it to him, and as I did, his eyes got just a bit smaller.

"Interesting," he mused.

Well, while Ash was getting his butt kicked by good old Brock, Misty, Shade and I went out to explore.

"I didn't know Pewter City residents had so much crap to read about," said Shade, looking at a fairly thick newspaper.

I shrugged. "It's a pretty big city."

Misty grinned. "Hey, look!"

She pointed to an old trinket shop.

"Come on!" She grabbed the collars of the jackets Shade and I were wearing and dragged us to it.

When she opened the door, a tiny bell rang.

"What can I do for you young ones?" asked an old woman from behind a counter.

"Just looking," said Misty, already investigating a silver Dewgong charm.

Shade looked puzzled. "Now what?"

"Dunno," I murmured. Suddenly, something caught my eye. It was a silver ring with a black jewel as the centerpiece.

"Ah, I see you've shown interest in my old ring," said the old woman.

"What?" I asked, still gazing at the ring.

"That ring's got a story behind it," said the woman. "Once, quite a long time ago, really…"

_Two fairly young twin brothers sat on the swings at an abandoned park. One wore glasses, and the other didn't. The one without the glasses wore a ring with a black stone in it._

_"Do you think that we'll ever find a good home?" asked the one without the glasses._

_The spectacled twin gazed at the rippling sea before them. "I don't know," he said softly. "First our brother goes missing and leaves this ring behind, then our mom goes insane and beats us, and our dad gets shot." He sighed. "I don't know."_

"You see," said the old woman, "these twins' mother loved their younger brother dearly, and when he went missing, she went insane. She beat the twins nearly to death, and when their father was shot and killed, they were sent to an orphanage. They lived there miserably for a time, until Team Rocket, who was in search for rare Pokémon, blew up the orphanage."

I think my jaw hit the dusty floor. "No kidding?"

"Everyone escaped unhurt, except for the twins," said the old lady sadly.

_The twins were in a room that was about to collapse._

_"Get out!" yelled the ringed twin. "Hurry!"_

_The spectacled twin closed his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said softly, and pushed the ringed twin out of the second story window._

_The poor boy landed on his back on a patch of grass. He watched sadly as the building finally fell in a cloud of dust._

"You see," said the woman, "the boy that survived almost went crazy."

_"They took him!" yelled the boy, flailing like mad against everybody holding him against the stretcher. "They're gonna beat him, kill him, drop him in the ocean! STOP THEM!"_

"He was in so much grief that he gave me the ring," she continued.

_"Why should I have this?" asked the woman in a perplexed tone._

_"It belongs to my brother," said the boy quietly. "It's caused too much pain for me to bear. Just give it to someone who shows interest in it. Oh, and this…" He pulled out a black cord with a ruby for a charm. "Give this to them, too."_

"And he left," she said.

"So," I said slowly, "you're saying that I should have them?"

"With my blessing," she replied.

When I asked her how much it was, she shook her head. "He told me to give it to you, albeit indirectly."

So, I left with a ruby necklace and a ring.

I defeated Brock with only Charmeleon, thanks to its Metal Claw. Boy, is it fast.

Anyway, I was relaxing on a sofa in the Pokémon Center with a steaming mug of hot chocolate when Misty strolled in, followed by a panting Shade.

"Your friends are freaks," he murmured, letting himself fall backwards onto an extremely comfortable-looking chair.

"What'd she do to you?" I asked.

"She was mad at Ash and began chasing me for no reason," he muttered. "Crazy, innit?"

"Sure," I said boredly.

We decided to take a walk, where we passed Ash trying to turn a water wheel to power up his Pikachu. Talk about innovative.

The next day, Ash battled him again and you know the drill.

The real punch line came when we figured out that Flint was Brock's long-lost dad. Boy, was he in for a tough job.

We left that night for Mt. Moon.

"Hey, Ash, are you sure it's okay if I go with you on your Pokémon journey?" asked Brock.

"Sure I'm sure!" said Ash. "The more the merrier! And, it's good to have somebody to talk with."

"What are we, next-door neighbors?" I asked indignantly.

"Yeah, don't forget the quiet hothead and the bad omen," muttered Shade.

"Well, what about that girl who keeps following you?" asked Brock.

We all turned to face Misty.

"Don't forget about my bike, Ash Ketchum!" said Misty. "I'm gonna follow you 'till you pay me back!"

"I know!" Ash said tiredly, sweatdropping. "I know! Pikachu, let's try to lose her!" He and Pikachu ran ahead.

"Wait up, Ash!" yelled Brock, running after them.

"Don't forget your next-door neighbors!" yelled Shade, tailing Brock.

"Already been done," I muttered, running after them.

"You won't get away!" yelled Misty, running after us.

**So, we've got another OC on our hands, huh? (If only you knew.) Well, review!**


	8. Mt Moon Mooned Me

**Dedication: pikachuhunter1 and AceTrainerTe**

**I think this story has gone down in the dumps. I mean, come on. I checked how many hits I have, and more than half of them are only in the first chapter. Heck, the last two only had six each. People, tell me what's wrong so I can fix it. But, it's my li- ACHOO! –sorry, ah, story, so, be reasonable.**

**Okay, here goes. Chapter 8 of Blaze's story. Expect a couple more OCs in the future. Just a warning.**

**Ender Zero Missingno: They've got warning labels all over them.**

**rubyminuszero: Shut up. They're really good characters; trust us.**

A giant mountain loomed in the distance, growing slightly larger with every step we took.

Mt. Moon.

Pikachu was sleeping on Ash's backpack. Lucky.

Misty's eyes were shining. "Mount Moon! Ah, doesn't the name sound romantic?"

"Yeah, sure, and Cinnabar Island is as cold as the North Pole," Shade muttered. "You're hopeless, Misty. Pathetically hopeless."

Misty growled. "SHUT UP!"

"Geez, give it a rest, Mister," I grumbled.

"People say that a huge meteor-" Brock began.

"Meteor_ite_," I corrected.

"…crashed into the mountain back in prehistoric times," he finished.

"A meteor…" said Ash in awe.

"Is it really true?" asked the Mister.

"The meteor's called the Moon Stone," said Brock.

"Oh, now that's romantic!" squealed Misty.

"Oh, now that's hopeless," muttered Shade.

"AAAAAAAAH!"

Pikachu's ears shot up like little yellow rockets.

"Over there!" Ash yelled.

We ran in the direction of the yelling.

Outside a cave mouth, squeaking Zubat were attacking someone in a lab coat. He was on the ground, his hands over his head.

"It's a bunch of Zubat," said Ash.

"No way, really?" I said sarcastically.

"They're attacking that guy," said Misty.

"Gee, thanks, we really needed you to tell us that," said Shade sarcastically.

"Dexter, analyze!" cried Ash, pulling out his Pokédex.

"Zubat," said the Pokédex. "Blind Pokémon with supersonic powers. Zubat live in caves and hate to fly outside in daylight."

"Not these Zubat," muttered Ash.

"This is no time for jokes!" yelled Misty in his face. "That guy needs our help!"

"You're right; I'm sorry," he said. "Pikachu, Thundershock!"

And, as they say, the rest is history.

Of course, Brock, Shade and I tossed PokéBalls at some Zubat. We each caught one. The rest darted back into the cave.

"Ah, oh, ohhhh," groaned the man.

Ash gasped. "Are you okay?"

The man shot up. "Wow!" He pulled Ash and Pikachu into a bone-crushing embrace. "You guys are the greatest!"

"Really, it was nothing…" said Ash in a muffled tone.

"I'm talking superfantabulistic! I mean two thumbs up! WAY up! The best rescue I've ever had!"

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP.

Brock, Shade, the Mister and I all winced.

The man stood up. "They say man's best friend is a Pokémon, and with you two I believe it."

"Uh, that's nice," said Ash confusedly.

"I'm so moved! Such friendship I thought I'd never see, when the Zubat began attacking me! I thought I was done for when who should arrive, two heroes thanks to whom I'm alive!" He thrust his arms out. "I'M ALLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! THANK YOU SO MUCH, THANK YOU!"

"He certainly doesn't look like the poetic type," observed Misty.

"You certainly don't look like the hopelessly romantic type," Shade pointed out.

"You certainly don't look like an idiotic jerk," she retorted.

"Why, thank you," said Shade politely.

"Shut up!" Brock and I said loudly.

"Did I mention how grateful I am?" asked the man.

"Yeah," said Ash perplexedly, "um, anyway, why were the Zubat attacking you, mister?"

"Never call me mister!" cried the man.

"Yeah, that's her name," I said boredly, jerking a thumb in Misty's direction.

She kicked me in the face. Bingo! That hurt. I spat blood out of my mouth and wiped my face. "Sorry, Mister," I said apologetically.

WHAM.

Note to self: Never provoke someone who is capable of ramming a wooden mallet into your guts.

I keeled over and almost hurled, except for the problem that I couldn't breathe.

"My name's Semor!" cried the man. "Semor the scientist!" He struck a pose. "Knowledge, (another pose), research. (Another pose.) I'm Semor the scientist!"

We all stared at Semor. What a character.

Turns out that the entire cave was strung with lights, which resulted in the confusion of the Pokémon living in said cave, such as Paras planting the tochukaso that grew on their backs in the ground, and dry Sandshrew.

"That's why I'm here," Semor was saying as he was leading us through the cave. "On patrol to protect the mountain from the troublemakers that attack against these caves."

"Troublemakers? Why attack a cave?" asked Misty.

"Three guesses who did this," I murmured.

"I'm afraid it's because of the Moon Stone," said Semor.

"The Moon Stone?" asked Ash, confused as ever.

"Exactly," said Semor quietly. He puffed up his chest.

I stretched. Oh, goodie. Oh, joy. Oh, bliss. Lame entertainment.

He began his poem. "The moon stone is an awesome boulder, a million years old or even older! Deep in these caves the meteor hides, though no explorer has found the place of the legendary rock from space!" His eyes were shining. He pulled out a magnifying glass and peered at a sparkling rock. "We've studied its fragments for many an hour, and discovered it increases a Pokémon's power." He disappeared for a moment, and reappeared with a pickax and a hard hat. "And that is why the attackers are here. To take the Moon Stone, or so I fear."

"The Moon Stone?" Ash repeated.

Semor said that ever since he was a kid, he'd believed that Pokémon came from outer space, and that the Moon Stone was their ship.

"It sure is an original theory," said Misty.

"About the Moon Stone bringing Pokémon to earth, or you being an idiot?" Shade asked.

WHAM. That would hurt.

After a bit of Semor's overly peppy talk and Ash's confused agreeing, a Clefairy holding a stone bounded by.

"That looks like a… Clefairy," said Brock.

Misty gasped, clasped her hands, and her cheeks tinged red. "It's so cute!"

Shade gasped, clasped his hands, and his cheeks tinged red. "You're a freak!"

Then we did the entire Pokédex thing, and Ash tried to catch it, but Semor stopped it, and – You don't really need to read all this, do you? It's not exactly that important.

Well, when Team Rocket showed up, I flew the coop. I could've easily kicked their butts into the next season, but they weren't worth my time. Ash and Misty are always saying that they would never deliberately hurt anybody, but I think Team Rocket would tell a different story.

I ended up in the woods in the middle of the dark. Perfect. Just perfect. I was getting ready to head back when I heard a voice.

"Cleffa!" said the voice.

I turned to see a Cleffa peering nervously at me from behind a bush.

"Hey, buddy," I said softly. "Something wrong?"

Cleffa shivered. "Cleleleleleleleleleleleleleleleleleleffffffffffffffa."

"Why don't you come on over here?" I invited.

It leaped into my chest and promptly fell asleep.

I chuckled to myself, stood up, and walked off to go find Ash, Shade, the Mister, Brock and Semor, cradling Cleffa in my arms.

Okay, I know that is SO not me, but what would you have done?

Anyway, when I found them, they were in a cave, gawking at the Moon Stone. Forgot me again.

Then I noticed something. Shade was missing. I bet he went off on his own again. Well, good luck to him.

Dozens of Clefairy gathered around the now glowing Moon Stone. They said hello and began dancing around the boulder.

The Clefairy that Pikachu had befriended back in the first cave was talking to the yellow electric mouse.

Ash asked Pikachu what they were talking about, and Pikachu responded by playing charades. Ash's first guess was that they were doing the Macarena. Uh, don't think so.

"The Clefairy… pick up?" mused Ash.

"A pickup truck?" asked Brock.

"Raisin!" yelled Misty. "I got it!"

"Pika," said Pikachu for the gazillionth time that day.

"Sounds like raisin," Misty said to herself.

"Craisin?" I suggested sarcastically, only to have the Mister smack me in the face.

"Careful," I warned. "I'm holding this Cleffa, remember."

"The Clefairy like raisins?" Ash asked.

Pikachu yanked a hair from Ash's head and waved it around.

"What rhymes with hair?" Misty asked.

"With hair…" Brock murmured. "Hey! How about prayer?"

Pikachu held up a sign with a circle on it. "Pikachu!"

"The Clefairy pray to the Moon Stone!" Ash cried.

Pikachu held up two circle signs. "Pikachu, pikachu!"

Of course, Team Rocket showed up.

And they tricked Ash and Brock with a battle, and left with the Moon Stone.

I followed Brock's Onix underground, and pulled myself out the other end to find everybody dazed and lying on the ground.

As soon as I stood up, Semor and the Clefairy popped up. The Clefairy used their Metronome attack and sent Team Rocket all the way into the next chapter. Chunks of the Moon Stone went everywhere. I managed to catch quite a few, and stowed them away for future situations.

Semor decided to live with the Clefairy, and we left him the next morning with big smiles, except for me. I was deep in thought about my black Pokémon predicament.

"Cleffa!" said a voice.

I turned to see Cleffa following me.

"So, you wanna come with me?" I asked.

It nodded enthusiastically, and, needless to say, I began walking down the path, this time with a star-shaped pink puffy Pokémon on my team.

We soon found ourselves in front of a sign. It read: **CERULEAN CITY**, and a red arrow pointed to the right. Something was scribbled in the lower right corner that I couldn't quite see from where I was.

"This road leads to… Cerulean City," said Brock, reading the sign. "Well, I guess we're headed the right way." He leaned closer. "And there's something else scribbled here…"

Ash closed his eyes and grinned. "Yeah, well they say some kids like to write silly notes on these signs." He opened his eyes. "What's it say?"

It read:

**GARY WAS HERE**

**ASH IS A LOSER!**

"Gary was here…" read Ash.

I rolled my eyes. Here we go.

"Loser!" he yelled. He began fuming. "Ohhhhh, that Gary…" He jumped up. "I'LL SHOW YOOOOOOUUUUUUU!" he screeched, and dashed off in the direction the sign pointed.

"What's the hurry?" called Misty.

"He'll never learn," said Brock in a resigned tone.

"Thanks, Professor Obvious," I muttered.

**And thus ends the latest chapter: Mt. Moon Mooned Me.**

**rubyminuszero: The title leaves something to be desired…**

**Right, right, whatever. Review, 'cause I only have six reviews, and that's not very many at all.**


End file.
